MaysCritters... a.k.a. The Mays Family

Lots of Kids, Lots of Love

2010-10-20T09:41:00.000-07:00

I am home alone for a bit having left my job for another that is closer to home and will allow me the opportunity to spend more time with my family. I find myself comparing in contrast quiet and chaos. Parenthood is such a blessing. Isn't it awesome the tidal wave of love that washes over you the moment you hear your child's first cry and feel that soul next to yours? It's a forever love that does not diminish, no matter the circumstance. I cannot think of or imagine anything that compares to the feeling. I would say 9 out of 10 times, when people see or learn I have 4 kids, they are taken aback and look upon me with wide eyes or pity, and often comments follow that reflect apparent doubts about my sanity, probably because they are thinking of all the messes, quarrels, and chaos - all valid thoughts. I feel like we may never catch up on housework, and a quiet home is a rare experience! Yet peace and joy are ever present, even amidst the chaos. Unconditional love brings peace and joy with it that, if you let it, supersedes any negative thoughts or emotions. We do not usually pity or question the sanity of those with lots of grandchildren & great grandchildren. We smile and think how blessed they are, and it seems most grandparents relish being surrounded by grandchildren in abundance. One may suppose this is because they have the option of brief encounters. However, I believe maturing brings wisdom and the realization, in retrospect, that love is all that matters in life and worth anything that challenges us. Why wait until then to delight in such bounty? And how many people actually look back and regret having children? There is no need to pity us who have lots of kids. Rather think of that feeling when you first embraced your sweet baby or the way you felt larger than yourself after you said, "I do." Now multiply it by 2, 4, 10. The more people you love and allow to love you, the more love resides in your heart. Think of it this way, and you will get a glimpse of our great fortune!

=-)

Legacy of Love

2008-05-30T23:05:00.000-07:00

My Uncle Colby passed on Tuesday. I've known him all my life. We spent almost if not every Thanksgiving and Christmas with our families growing up at Nanny & PePa's, whether it was at the house in Baytown or on Lake Livingston. But I did not know Colby very well. He was a quiet man, not boisterous like my dad, Uncle Mark, and even sometimes Nanny. But if he had something to say, he would say it. What I do know is that he loved his family very much. When I heard of his passing, I could not help but remember my dad's death, also at such a young age. Dad was 50; Colby was 53. So young. I feel great empathy for Terri, Brent & Amie, and little Gracie. I cannot imagine how PePa feels, to have lost his son.

I woke up on Wednesday from a dream, grabbed some paper immediately, and words just flowed from my mind, my heart, and my pen. It wasn't a dream with people or events but rather an intense peaceful feeling, as if I were in the arms of my Father where I felt warm and loved. I did not know until the day of the funeral, that Colby had recently come to love the Lord deeply and accept Christ as his Savior. I was so sure after I wrote the poem that it was God speaking through me to comfort broken hearts. I am certain of it now. As I wrote, I knew the words were spoken from my own dad's heart and spirit, but I felt as if it had to be something Colby's heart would say also. It's gushy, definitely not something either of them would say, but I believe some of the most macho of men have the softest, most loving hearts and feel much more than they express aloud. The dream brought me peace and comfort from the sadness I was feeling for Colby's family and remembering the loss of my own daddy, and the words just poured from my heart, so they must have been given to me by the Spirit. I hope they brought comfort to everyone who Colby loved and who loved him. I felt great joy hearing the story of Colby's last days with his family and with God. Colby, his family, and all who were fortunate to know him, we are very blessed.

Legacy of Love

How do I know I have lived a full life?

One I could be proud to have shared with my family, my wife?

Life should not be measured in terms of its length,

But rather let's measure the love and its strength.

Love is an awesome, powerful entity.

It transcends life and death, goes on for infinity.

Our beautiful family shares memories and love.

That is my legacy, and what I'm most proud of.

If I had to revisit my life in a mirror

Looking at myself from farther to nearer,

I would see that the good stuff outweighs the bad

And that our many happy times overshadow the sad.

I wish I said, "I love you," more than I had, too.

But I tried always to show it, and I hope that you knew.

I loved you more than my life, more than can ever be measured.

I am right there in your heart, a deeply buried treasure.

Although I am gone, and my body will disappear.

My love will never die; I will always be near.

Love always,

Carrie

I have to end this with a lighthearted story because that is how I remember Colby, lighthearted, always with a grin, ready to laugh. Mom told me this story a long time ago, and it has stuck with me. Nanny liked to tell it, too. I have written before about how I thought my dad was Superman. I wonder if Brent or Amie ever thought their dad was Superman? Well, Colby thought he was Superman! When he was very young, he was so sure that he could fly like Superman, he climbed to the roof of his house, and my mom and Uncle Mark watched in disbelief, unable to stop him. Colby spread his arms like wings and dove off the house. I bet he felt free like a bird, as if he could really fly, for at least a moment before realizing he was plunging towards the ground. He broke his leg, but his spirit was never broken. After his last breath, I imagine Colby spread his arms again. Only this time, he did fly.

Texas Bluebonnets

2008-04-08T20:33:00.000-07:00

We were snapping pictures of each other in the bluebonnets on a spectacular spring day and were fortunate a fellow picture taker passed by and asked us if we wanted a photo of all of us together. Bluebonnet photos have been a tradition since before the kids were born. My love for wildflowers started my freshman year in college when I was attending Texas Woman's University in Denton, far from home. Classes were Mon/Wed - Tues/Thurs, so we had 3 day weekends which would ordinarily be awesome. But all my friends went home for the weekend, and I didn't have a car. The campus was dead, and I was very bored. So I was either studying (I got 4.0 that year), playing golf on our 9 hole course, tennis with the wall, or walking around town. There was a lovely garden near the chapel on campus, and I spent a lot of time there. In the spring, wildflowers were bountiful and beautiful. I bought a wildflower nature guide from the bookstore. I found out TWU had a wildflower course in the spring, and I would have loved to take that class except I did not attend TWU the next year. I met a fellow student from Houston who made trips home and took me along for the ride. She was taking the class, and one of their assignments was to collect and take pictures of various wildflowers. They are plentiful on Texas highways, so we made many stops on the drive there and back. I was hooked! The next year, when I went to Sam Houston in Huntsville, I took my friend Kelly with me to go flower hunting, and we took pictures of each other in the Bluebonnets. That's when the tradition began. I met Dan during wildflower season; our first date was on April 7th, 1994. (He took me country western dancing at the Jolly Fox). So for our anniversary the next year, we took pictures of each other in the Bluebonnets and then again the next year, the year we got married. We missed a couple of years but then started back up again when Dallas and Noah were toddlers. Those were the pre-digital years, so I need to scan them in. How much they have all changed! Here's the last four years of Bluebonnet photos. This is an extensive collection, so you might want to grab a snack or a cup of tea while you peruse the pictures...

April 18, 2004

Savanna was 3 weeks old.

This is one of my favorites:

March 25, 2005

Bailey is an embryo. I did not even know I was pregnant here!

Savanna is 1.

Dallas is 9.

Noah is 8.

I'm thinking 2006, if we took pictures (I can't remember), might be on disk because our old computer was getting very full from all the picture files.

April 1, 2007

This was a long day for us. We took these pictures after having gone to the Capitol in Austin, up Mt. Bonnell, and to the "Round Rock" that our town is named after. Naturally, Bailey does not look very pleased to be taking pictures.

Noah is 9.

We took Flat Stanley with us that day. I like the detail on the flowers in this picture.

Dallas is 10.

Savanna is 3, & Bailey is 1.

April 8, 2008

UPDATE: We had to skip pictures in 2009 It was a bad year for Bluebonnets in 2009. There were only sporadic blooms, =-( not enough for good pictures. But we got amazing pictures in 2008 and 2010 to make up for it. Check out the October post for a great group shot of my beautiful family!

Bailey is 2; Savanna just turned 4.

We took over 100 shots! Lots of good ones, too.

I love the kissing pictures. So precious!

My babes.

Dallas is 11.

Noah turns 10 on April 12th.

It wasn't easy getting posed for this shot. Bailey was done taking group pictures on cue.

Bailey said, "Pow!" His hand is a five-shooter. He likes to shoot us and has says, "Pow!" or "Pow-pow!" for a double whammy. We did it once a few weeks ago, and it has become his favorite game to play. When he shoots you, you have to moan, "Oh!" and then play dead. If you shoot him back, he will fall to the ground wounded. It's hilarious. He can't get enough of this game!

A sweet moment between Dallas and Savanna - so very rare!

I love this picture of Dan and the kids.

Look! A bird!

Dan and the boys. Pow! Bailey got you - Oh!

Daddy kissing sandwich.

Noah and his silly face. Bailey is shooting again.
Pow!

Savanna loves her sunglasses. Bailey loves sunglasses also (he wears mine a lot), but he breaks them. He needs the Flexons!

Dog pile! Dan rough houses with the kids all the time, so we have dog piles pretty often. If you count the feet, you can see they're all in there. Bailey's usually on top, but he got sandwiched in this time!

Bailey caught on that we were posing for pictures, so copped a squat right in a pretty patch of flowers. So cute!!

But after I took the picture, he was right back up again!

Uh-oh. Ummmm. Bailey's breaking the law here!

Seriously though, it is actually not illegal to pick bluebonnets, but it is highly discouraged because Bluebonnets only grow back if the seeds drop after the flowers are done blooming. Bluebonnet patches only grow a little bit each year when they re-seed, so if everyone were to pick the flowers, the numbers would dwindle. It is devastating if they get mowed down. We should do like Miss Rumphius (a really good picture book); she's the "lupine lady" and spreads lupine seeds all around to make the world a more beautiful place. Indian Paintbrushes are pretty lupines as well. I especially love when there are a few Indian Paintbrushes sprinkled about in a huge Bluebonnet field. I've only found those along the highways so far. Here's my bunch scattered about the Bluebonnets.

Noah took pictures for us here.

Bailey decided to join us.

Noah snapped a pic of Savanna, a good shot, I think.

Then Savanna came over to join us.

And then she left.

Bailey is bringing me a flower. How sweet =-)

Dallas is taking pictures now.

Bailey decided to join us again. The kid can't stay in one place for more than 2 seconds!

Noah and Mama.

Dallas and Mama.

That's all, folks! Until next Spring, that is....
=-)

Easter Sunday Egg Hunt

2008-03-23T10:02:00.000-07:00

Confetti Egg Party!
Dallas is the first to get whacked!

Then Savanna.

Bailey's been smacked!

Savanna's got the hang of it now!

Here comes another one!
I think she's picking on Bailey because she can reach him.

Oh, my head.

Hey! Not the Mama!

Shake it out.

Cleaning Mama's hair:

Daddy's turn for a cleaning.

I told Savanna to clean Daddy like the monkeys do (eat it).

She looks at it.

And goes for it!

Hmmm, that was... interesting.
Most fittingly, she is a Monkey on the Chinese Zodiac.
MOST fitting!

That was fun!

Chocolate time!
Raccoon:

Earless Bunny:

Earless Bunny #2 - Do I detect a trend?
Why does everybody like to eat the ears first?

Deer:

Mmmm. Chocolate.

And here's a "kiss" goodbye...

:-x XoXo ;-)

Mamas' Night Out

2008-03-18T23:45:00.000-07:00

Tonight was Cailey's first night away from her parents. She's 5 1/2 months old now, so Mama Candace needs a night out. Dan kept her while she and I went out for a couple of hours to "decompress." Dan did the alligator nose (what his mom calls it) where he rubs his finger gently from her forehead down her nose, and she fell fast asleep in his arms. We had a good time!

Cousin Dallas holding Cailey. Dallas LOVES babies.

Funny Face:

Cute Smile:

Aunt Carrie Loves Cailey ;-)

Kiss Kiss :-x Goodbye...

What's in a Name?

2008-03-08T15:46:00.000-08:00

When I was a cashier, I enjoyed my job because I got to talk to people from all walks of life. It made a quite monotonous job quite exciting. You never know who you are going to meet next and what sort of interesting things you will hear. Sometimes you get the same people and develop a working friendship. I usually start conversations whimsically with whatever crosses my mind at the time or with something I notice about the person that seems interesting. But there were a couple of topics that I would revisit quite often. One was of course, "What are you going to make with this?" This one's great for people who don't really look like they are having a very good day, and you surely don't want to ask the loaded question, "How are you today?" I have learned so much about cooking just from asking this simple little question and also tried many foods i ordinarily would have had no clue how to prepare. Take spaghetti squash, for example. If you've never heard of it, it is this large yellow oval-shaped vegetable, so rarely purchased that I never memorized the PLU code for it (that number we type into the register that tells it what produce item you are buying. 4011 is for bananas. Everybody buys bananas. I think I will know that number for the rest of my life!) I asked a customer, "What are you going to make with this?" and she told me she just pops it whole in a 370 degree oven for an hour. Then she cuts it open, scrapes it out and serves it with spaghetti sauce. She said it looks just like spaghetti and tastes similar. Of course, I had to try it, so I bought one that day. Sure enough, it looks just like spaghetti! And while it does not really taste like spaghetti, it does have great flavor when served with marinara, especially if you like yellow squash and zucchini. Zucchini taste good with tomato sauce also. I make a Zucchini lasagna where you use zucchini instead of pasta by thinly slicing the zucchini long ways. It is one of my family's favorite dishes. I think I could write a whole book about what I have learned about cooking and nutrition, but that is not what I wanted to talk about here.

The other question I would ask frequently is, "How did you get your name?" When you come in contact with lots of people, you get to learn some of the most interesting names, some that are collections of letters you have never seen or heard before. I love words, so I can't say that I have ever found a name that I didn't like. Every word has a meaning, and consequently, so does every one's name. Even if it is a completely made up concoction of letters, it was created by people who love their child and wanted to give them a name that was special and unique, and if you ask them, they will tell you what it means. So I love to ask that question, and people love to answer it, I think because people love to talk about their story. That's why we have so may autobiographies and blogs - it's fun to talk about your life, and your life began with your name. Most people have a name even before they are born, and in some cases, even before they are conceived! There is an interesting story behind my name. I loved hearing it when I was a kid, and I always love to tell it.

My mother told me that she had my name picked out before I was born. If I was a boy, I would have been Michael Ray, Jr. If I was a girl, I would have been Trisha Fay. This name was special to her. My dad was raised by his grandmother, Fay. Her name was actually Ellen Fay, but she went by Fay; her grandmother's name was also Ellen. My dad loved this woman so much because of all she did for him and his brother and 2 sisters after their parents left them. I think her influence on him is what inspired him to join the navy, so he could go to college and be able to take care of his family. I think maybe he would not have even wanted a family of his own if it were not for her. My mom loved Fay also, so she wanted to name her little girl after her. People often ask pregnant women what names they have chosen for their baby. my mom did not think anything of it when her sister-in-law asked her that question, so she answered it. It happens that they were both pregnant at the same time, but I was due a few weeks later. I am sure that my dad's sister loved Fay just as much as my dad for the same reasons, and she wanted to honor her also. However, she decided to name her baby girl the exact name that my mom had chosen for me, even spelled the same, too. Of course my mom was livid. So livid that she didn't even choose another girl's name. When I was born, she told my dad to name me, and he named me Carrie Lynn. This is the story my mom told me when I was a little girl. Now that I am thinking of this, I wish I had asked my dad why he chose that name for me. It's a pretty name, I think, although when I was little i thought it was very plain. My sisters' names were Catherine and Candace, but they went by Cathy and Candy. I was jealous that they had a longer name, that it was special that they had 2 first names. So in the 5th grade, when I moved to a new school, I decided to tell my new friend that my name was Carissa, and that I went by Carrie for short. She was the only one I told that story to, but I never told her about that fib until we were in high school! I felt bad about the lie all that time, but it turns out she had forgotten about it completely. My sisters now go by Candace and Catherine. I think they decided it sounded more grown up than Cathy or Candy. I am still Carrie, and I have not changed much except now I have a new last name and 4 kids who I get to tell the stories behind their names.

Dallas Michael

Because Dan is such a HUGE monster Dallas Cowboys fan and has been since his dad brainwashed him as a toddler, many have thought, including his and my family, that we named Dallas after the football team. Not so. In fact, I had the name Dallas picked out for my son even before I married Dan, before I even knew how crazy he was about the Cowboys. Dan's and my first date was on April 7, 1994. Football season was over, and our love was young. We did not discuss our affinity for any certain sports or teams. I got a summer job working as a counselor at a resident camp in Granbury, Texas. While there, I met a boy, a senior in high school, whose name was Dallas. He was from Tennessee. He was a CIT (counselor in training), and he was just an awesome human being. I only had sisters, so I didn't know much about boys. But I remember thinking if I ever had a son, I would hope he would be like this boy. He was kind, smart, personable, and fun. I would never have thought about Dallas as a name, especially being from Texas. It's a city. I once met a girl named Abilene. She had a brother named Jackson. Their parents travelled a lot, and she said they were all named after the cities they were conceived in. If I used that method, Dallas would be named Huntsville, Noah would be Houston, and Savanna and Bailey would share the name Round Rock - or maybe I could have named one Round and the other Rock. =-) After knowing the boy, I fell in love with the name. I also love unique names and other than him and my son, have never met another Dallas. As soon as he found out I was pregnant, my dad was extremely excited and would refer to him as "his baby." When he found out it was a boy, he really really really wanted me to name him Michael Ray, after him. We did choose his middle name for my dad. I love the name Michael but was not all that keen on Ray, and what he didn't know was that I already had Dallas's name picked out, even before he was born. Dan didn't even know. When I told him, he begged me not to name him Dallas because he just knew the ribbings he would get for it from his family. He was right, of course, and almost all our family were not all that thrilled with our name choice, but if you know Dallas, you know it is the right name for him. It fits him. Although the ultrasound tech was certain he was a boy (so was the tech who said Dan's little brother was a girl), I had a girl name picked out just in case: Chelsea Noelle. Chelsea for this sweet little girl I babysat for 2 summers in high school, and Noelle because my baby was due on December 31st. Dallas was born the day after Christmas, but I was calling him Dallas since the moment I found out he was a boy.

Noah Gabriel

When I found out I was pregnant for a second time, I really hoped I was having a girl. Originally, we planned to have 2 children, so I was a little sad when the ultrasound tech said he was a boy. She said she was 95% certain, so I didn't stay too upset. There was a 5% chance I was having a girl. However, when they put that little boy in my arms, I fell so deeply in love with him that I never cared again that I would not be having a little girl. But since Chelsea was especially created for baby one, I thought I should come up with a special name for baby two. I actually spent more time coming up with girl names than I did on boy names, probably because I knew it would be my last chance to. Women love to come up with girl names, at least all the women I have ever talked to about the subject. There are lots of names I loved, but Dan is very picky when it comes to names. He was very hard to please. Since I was so controlling over naming Dallas even though he didn't want to name him Dallas (He loved the name just like me; he just didn't want to hear all the Cowboys jokes from our families), this time I decided to let Dan have control over the name choice. Since he is a man, he had no clue how to come up with a name. I still don't know how my dad did it. So I made lists of names, and most of them got shot down, some of them were my favorites. I liked the name Jason for a boy - he hated it! My baby name search was my first encounter with the Internet. I was on http://www.babycenter.com/ all the time. Through my friend Anna, I met a girl named Kinsey when I was in junior high. Just like when I met Dallas, I was immediately intrigued by her unique name, but I wanted to spell it different. I also have always loved the name Isabella, but have never met anyone with that name. So for my 5% chance of having a girl, I chose the name Kenzie Isabel. I dropped the 'a' on Isabella because I thought it fit better. For a boy, I liked the name Bailey. Dan liked it, too, but he was a little concerned people would think we named him after the boy on a TV show that I cannot even remember the name of now. Even still, of all the names I came up with that I liked, that was his favorite. I picked the middle name from the lists on the internet, Donovan. I thought it sounded very manly, since Bailey was sometimes used as a girl's name. Bailey Donovan. Just like with Dallas, we went into childbirth with just 2 names (although we did still have Chelsea Noelle in the memory banks from before). We had done the baby thing before, drug free, so we were all prepared with our tape player and Enya tape. Unlike with Dallas, I was not calling the baby Bailey since I thought it still could be a girl. So when I met my new baby, after all the initial gamut of intense emotions, I realized our baby looked nothing like a Bailey. I could not name him Bailey, as much as I wanted to and loved the name. Ever since he was tiny, I had been calling Dallas "Geeger" (that's a story for another day), so before he had a name we called him "Little Bitty Geeger Babe" I had the baby name packed in my bag, who knows why, but I am glad! I was in the hospital for 2 days, and I spent most of my time lathering my baby with love and attention and a little time looking through the book. I didn't have the master list with me, so we were starting from scratch. When I was pregnant with Dallas, Dan had wanted to name him Noah. I was not thrilled with that name and had not really even considered it for this baby. But the name came back to me, and our baby looked like a Noah. So he had a name by the end of day one, but we were stumped on a middle name. We thought we could just wait and pick one later, but the nurse told us we could not leave until we filled out the social security form, which we found out later was not true. So at the very last moment we picked Gabriel. Dallas's middle name was that of an archangel. Gabriel is an archangel also and we liked it because of that. I am not totally certain that would have been the name we chose if we had more time, but we really wanted to go home! Noah's name fits him well also.

Savanna Rayne

When I found I was having a from my Dr.'s fancy 3-D sonogram that our baby was a girl (and with those images, there is no doubt whatsoever what the sex is), I was excited, elated, extremely exuberant! Mamas love to come up with little girl names. For some reason, they are a lot more fun than boys names, for me anyway. However, Dan is very hard to appease when it comes to girl names even more than boy names. Of course, Kenzie Isabel was still on the table as a choice, but the year before I became pregnant with Savanna, we added a puppy girl to our family and named her Chelsea for the girl that I never had. Little did we know we would get pregnant again! I came up with over a dozen full names, but the only one he liked was Savannah Rain. Yes, I spelled it that way at first. I actually love the name Anna because of a special friend of mine, but Dan was not too thrilled with it. But he really liked Savannah. When trying to think of a middle name, I envisioned a savannah and thought the image of a light rain was a beautiful picture. Very simple and pure. We decided to wait until our daughter was born to name her (learning from the Bailey-Noah incident) to see which name fit her best. I knew right when I saw her for the first time that she was Savannah. It was a last minute decision to change the spelling of her name to Savanna without the "h." I thought it was prettier that way, like my friend's name. The "h" is silent anyway, so I figured we'd save her a lot of trouble. (Not so, my friend, her name is misspelled more than any of my children. I didn't think the Georgia city was that well known, and you would not believe the ways people have misspelled my name - my pet peeve is when they spell it "Carry" like the verb - how ugly is that? I don't tell how to spell it anymore just to see new ways to spell my name! I don't think anyone has spelled Savanna right to date without my saying so.) And then right after I made that change, I had an epiphany and thought we could name her after Dan's and my father's and his father's middle name, Ray, by changing the spelling of "Rain" to "Rayne." Literally, I changed both spellings as I was filling out the social security form right before we left. I tried it out on paper a few times, and we both liked the new spelling better. I wanted a little girl from the first time I found out I was pregnant all the way to the third. The journey began with Chelsea Noelle for our Christmas baby, then Kenzie Isabel, and finally Savanna Rayne. I got my girl. Ironically, she is more boy than any of my boys!

Bailey Donovan

This one's easy. We've already talked about it. This was the name we had picked out for Noah. Since I got my girl, I really had no special desire for a girl or a boy this time. I knew how to raise boys, but I gave away most of our boy clothes and toys. I had loads of cute baby girl clothes, bibs, and toys. So Dan and I decided to be surprised this time. It was frustrating because the sex was listed right there in my chart, and we had to keep reminding Dr. Schwertner not to accidentally slip the sex to us. Just like it's not that common for mothers to have natural labor anymore (every time I did it, the nurses were excited to be doing something different), it was equally uncommon for moms to not want to know the sex of the baby. I am so glad we did it. It was very exciting! I really didn't have a preference, but I was so sure it was going to be a girl. I figured I have my babies in twos, why not two girls, then two boys? I was really surprised when Dr. Sherman told me he was a boy! We had a list of names available, but Kenzie Isabel and Bailey Donovan were our favorites. And thank goodness, he looked like a Bailey! He actually looked exactly like Dallas. When I saw him, it brought me back to the day my first baby was born nine years earlier.

I love my babies, I love my children, and I put a lot of thought and love into choosing their names. When I speak their names, I speak my love. I hope they love their name and their story.

So what's in a name? Lots of love, that's what. Just ask my kids when I jokingly talk of changing their names. They would not feel as sweet,or special, by any other name.

Cailey at the Wheel

2008-02-27T23:05:00.000-08:00

Look out, people! Baby on the move! Honk-Honk!

Cautiously hangin' a left:

Mama Candace says, "Carrie, she's too young to drive!"

"Aww, Mom, I looked so cool in that little red coupe!"

Big 'Ol Pot'o'Love

2008-02-14T14:37:00.000-08:00

I'm cookin' me up somethin' sweet!

Daddy Daughter Dance - Savanna & Dan

2008-02-08T22:31:00.000-08:00

Every year since they opened, the Clay Madsen Rec Center has hosted a Daddy Daughter Dance around Valentine's Day. Dads bring their sweethearts from age 0 and up to an old fashioned gymnasium style dance and play music kids like. Dan took Savanna last year, but she was scared most of the time. Dan ended up holding her the entire time. This year, however, she LOVED it!

Dan told me the first song when they got there was "Dancing Queen." I heard him say in the video that it was my "favorite song." This is a joke, of course, because a few years ago it was one of those songs that, when I would hear it, would make my blood boil. I originally liked the song somewhat, didn't hate it, but when I worked at Hastings, for a few months, there was a preview on the TVs in the video department that played the song, and I kid you not, it played several times an hour. I worked there several years, and there were other previews and songs that played that I was able to completely tune out, but for some reason, I don't know, maybe it was the tone of their high pitched voices, but it caught my attention every time I heard it. I wanted to pierce my eardrums with an ice pick! I am afraid if those TVs were within my reach instead of mounted on the ceiling, I might have done something totally out of character and kicked in the screen. It's a good thing they were mounted on the ceiling...

When Savanna got home from the dance, she told me right away that she wanted to go dancing again. I thought she meant next year or in the near future, but she meant that night - right then! She also said she wanted to "go dancing with Mama." Awwww. Someday she'll get why they only have a Daddy Daughter dance. There are so few opportunities for a man and his little girl to have some special tome together. I think it would be nice if they had one of those every month or every few months instead of once a year. Daddies should take their daughters out at least once a month if they can, or whenever they get a chance - even if it's to the hardware store (my dad), or to Fry's (Dan) to check out what's new. Men give us a hard time about lolly gagging around the grocery store or the department store, but they like to browse the store that holds stuff they're interested in - it's true!

Here's a little IMO sidebar ---

IMO... Daddies are the biggest influence on their daughters choice of men.

Savanna & I get lots of girl time, but I think Daddy/Daughter time is the most important time in a girl's life.

Why?

It teaches her what it feels like to be treated with love and respect by a man. They say a girl looks for a man like her father as a life partner, and they do - they really do. All of us, we only know what we see first hand, what we experience. TV only warps us because 99.9% of it, even the "reality" shows, is unrealistic. Please don't let your children learn about relationships from TV.

So Daddies need to be the man that they would want their daughter to marry. Treat her with respect, never demean her or call her names (unless you want her to bring a guy like that home), and show her every day how special she is, just like she is, so that she will expect no less from the man she chooses. Yep, Dads, it's all you, fellas; you gotta step up to the plate!

But the Mamas are not off the hook! Sometimes you have to teach your man how to treat your daughter. I have three sisters, so I had no clue what to do with these boys I've been blessed with. Dan lets me know when I've messed up because I don't get the male psyche. And Mamas, you have to call him out when he says or does something that you know would have hurt you if your daddy did it. I bet even men who had sisters are clueless when it comes to female emotions and self esteems. So we have to teach them. It's perfect that parenting is meant to be a team effort. We are in a position of great power; these children are captive audiences because they know not to interrupt, even if they feel they are being mistreated, and we don't always know what it feels like to be on the receiving end of our actions. Just tell him privately what he did wrong and a better way to handle that situation, so he can go fix it right away.

We make all sorts of mistakes as parents, and the people we love the most end up feeling hurt. Even a tiny hurt still hurts. Those are the best - you just kiss it, and it feels better. A simple, "I'm sorry." is like a kiss on the boo boo to a little girl who is feeling hurt, but add in there an "I shouldn't have done that because I love you, and you are special to me," and you will have given her the band-aid that she really wanted. You will have just taught her not to accept behavior like that from anyone, not even from someone you love. You will have also shown her how simple and easy it is to apologize and forgive. This is one of the toughest things as a parent and in a marriage. I know it is for me. There were not many apologies in my house growing up, if any; I cannot think of one. Well, there was this one time, but he did not say it out loud. I just knew from his expression and comportment that he was sorry. It was enough for me; it meant the world to me, and I accepted it. In that one little moment, years of pain and heartache were erased. But I know I would have liked to hear him say it. And although it helped me to move forward, I still have a hard time giving or accepting apologies from my loved ones, the adults. I really want to. I am thinking it, but I do not and don't even know why. Life would be so much easier if I would just say it. It is hard to fix, but I am trying. Save your daughter that heartache. It is much easier to apologize to children. They have no baggage unless you give it to them; they are open and accepting and forgive you your faults even when you don't say you're sorry -- for a while. The time will come, as it did for me, when you will put up a wall to protect your heart. Daddies need to be there forever next to their daughters hearts, instead of walls.

I hope they have Daddy/Daughter dances in every town and that we keep having them here. Otherwise, dim the lights, get out the strobe lights & disco ball, and put the telly on one of those fifty some odd music channels. You will have a lot more fun than if you were watch even your favorite TV program as a family. Maybe that's what we'll do since they only have the dance once a year. The whole family can dance together, and Savanna can get her wish and dance with Mama, too!

Here's some more cute photos of them together. I tried to fix Savanna's hair, snip it a little to even it out, but I don't know how to fix it (after the Great Haircut Fiasco - see below for details).

Savanna loves to go "round round." I bought this as her special Christmas dress; I try to find ones that look like they will spin well. What little girl does not like a dress that twirls?

Camera Quest

2008-01-21T15:16:00.000-08:00

I have been researching relentlessly and have found the camera that I would like:

(Looks almost exactly like my old camera!) I was a little taken by the snazzy compact cameras because of how light they are, and that you can take them anywhere with you in your pocket or small purse. I was focusing on them at them first. But after researching the best compact cameras in my price range (and even some above), I was very disappointed with the quality of the photos, and they were also missing much of what I wanted in a camera.

My broken camera is a Canon Powershot A75 with 3.2 megapixels and a 3X digital zoom which I rarely used because the photo quality was not that great. I think the only time I used it was at football practices! How funny. Once, I used it when we were at a UT football practice with Vince Young in his final year with the Longhorns - one of the many wonderful perks of being a Cub Scout. It was a bright afternoon, so even though they were grainy, we got some pretty good shots of him smiling and enjoying himself on the field. We also used it to take shots this last summer of the Cowboys training camp in San Antonio. It was an indoor stadium, so the shots were not as good.

I have really loved taking pictures with it. I was able to use it right out of the box without reading the instructions. The manual is still in the box, untouched! Few things bothered me about the camera, but one was the weight. If you don't use rechargeable batteries, it's even heavier. My diaper bag is already so heavy, and carrying the camera, too, made it more of a back breaker! This newer one is probably not going to be any lighter.

Another was the shutter lag time. You can't just keep shooting like you can with a 35mm, but the trade off is worth it most of the time because you get to see instantly whether or not you got a good shot, and you can keep trying and shooting without worrying about wasting precious film. But we did miss out on a lot of great candid shots. Sometimes you get a lot of posed shots because you have to ask your subject, "Do that again!"

Also, it was quite annoying that you could only take 3 minutes of video at a time. So at Christmas and birthdays, our videos were just snippets. But it was pretty good quality video if we had good lighting.

And finally, I ended up with many great shots that were fuzzy and blurry because my hand is not that steady.

So I am very excited to have found the Canon Powershot A570 IS. The "IS" stands for image stabilization, so that takes care of that last little annoyance. Four years ago we paid about $300 for our camera, and this 7.1 mp (more than double!) runs $179. But I just found it on sale at Best Buy for $149 - pretty good deal I think. Payday isn't until Friday though, and I still have to crank the numbers to see if we can afford it. If not, I am pretty sure I can find it on sale again somewhere. This is a really good camera, better than our previous one at half the price.

Even though it is not compact, I like that it uses AA batteries because I already have the rechargeable, so I don't have to buy an extra battery or mess with making sure I have charged batteries. A wonderful quality in a camera for a busy mom who has more important things to worry about. All of the compacts have their own proprietary rechargeable batteries. I have gotten caught without having any charged batteries before, and it is great to have the option of popping in batteries, even if you have to stop by the store. They don't last as long as rechargeable ones, but this feature really comes in handy.

Also, this one has the ability to take continuous video until your card fills up. Another annoyance resolved! (Best Buy also has 1GB SDHC cards on sale for $30).

I won't know about how I feel about the shutter lag time until I'm taking pictures with it, but I'm thinking it can only be better since everything else has been upgraded so much. I've read all the specs on it, and I really don't understand it because it all depends on the lighting, whether you're using the flash, if your subjects are in motion, and probably even more.

Another plus is that I have been using Canons for years now. Why not stick with what works and what you know? My 35mm before we went digital was a Powershot; it still works very well. It even looks a little like these do. After I replace my camera, I plan on giving it to my mom so she won't have to keep buying disposable cameras. I wanted to give it to her for Christmas before mine broke. I think she will like the quality of the pictures much better than the disposables.

The camera also got great reviews, especially this one:
http://www.dcresource.com/reviews/canon/powershot_a570-review/. I think this is the same place I did most of my research the last time I bought a camera. For its price range, this is an excellent camera. I was especially impressed by the night picture:

None of the compact cameras, even the ones quite more expensive, could compare in this shot.

I never thought of this function before, but it also has "white balance" which is something you can turn on when in certain light situations so you get a more truer white rather than a brownish or greenish white. Maybe now I will actually tinker around with this. Check this:

My old camera did have a lot of problems with red-eye, and I know when I finally have the time, I can go in and fix that with software if I can ever figure that out, or even with my handy dandy red-eye pen if I am scrapping a particular photo print, which is what I did with my 35mm photos. They've added a new feature where you can actually press a button to fix the red-eye in play-back mode. The reviewer was peeved that they didn't just make it so it automatically does this, but I am pretty impressed that you can do it at all. It will save me a lot of time this way!

It still has the face detection. I noticed the green squares before when I would focus the shots, but never really cared what they were for. I just knew if red squares came up, then it was having difficulty focusing on anything. But it has a bright flash, so most of the time, I got a good shot anyway. the bright flash can be annoying sometimes when you want to take a close up, because you ended up with a big bright white figure rather than a face. But overall, I have really loved this camera these past years, and I am excited to be getting a better version.

It even has a viewfinder for those situations where it's too bright to see the LCD. Since I'm usually trying to get the babies to look up at me making silly faces and voices so I can get their lovely smiles, I have developed a talent of knowing just where to hold the camera even without using the LCD or viewfinder. Sometimes I mess it up, but I have gotten some really great pictures this way, nothing like you can get when you are hiding behind a camera. You get lots of blank faces that way because they are wondering where you went!

Now, the next step up from this camera, the Powershot A720) is an even better camera that takes an even more impressive night shot (although the buildings seem to be quite bit more lit up this evening; that could be making a difference):

But it costs twice as much on sale - way out of my price range. I just can't wait long enough to save up for this one. I am having to stretch for this one already, but I would rather wait for it than settle for something less. I could buy a $39 camera that is the same quality (3.2mp) as mine now if I have to and then give it to Dallas when I'm able to get this one. Hey, there's even one a step up from that one (A650 IS) that has 12.1mp; it must take some awesome pictures, but it's crazy out of my price range, even if I want to save up, and even if I had a job, too! However, this one is perfect for us. I think I would recommend it to anyone with kids who loves to take family photos, especially candid shots (I think the image stabilization is going to blow me away). Pictures are my most precious possessions, other than the actual subjects of my photographic obsession. Except I do not own them. I am blessed to be able to share memorable moments with them that I love to document with pictures. And even if I don't get any pictures, I will always have the memories.

Patience, Carrie, patience...

UPDATE: Got it! It takes great pictures. I like the image stabilization. Only negative for me - lag time between shots taken with the flash. I believe it is because it only has 2 batteries as opposed to my previous model's 4 (which had less lag time). In their quest to make the camera lighter, they sacrificed time, which to me is more desirable over weight. When you have little ones, you miss out on a lot in those 3 seconds, especially if you are having them pose. But overall, it is a really good camera for the price. The research paid off! You can see for yourself in the quality of photos you see after this date...

IMO... Extra Sugar Free Gum is the Extra Best

2008-01-14T07:32:00.000-08:00

IMO...

This is a new thing I am starting just for fun. I often have fleeting thoughts about things like, "Hmmm, this gum has given me quite a long run of enjoyment." Something you normally wouldn't say out loud, unless you feel the need to talk a lot, but a notion that has enough worthiness to become a transient thought. It normally ends there, and I go about my business of being a mom, etc, but what if I were to take that thought and run with it? Isn't that what editorialist's do? I have lots of opinions on many subjects, many of which are silly, many of which are serious, but all of which are influenced by my life's expereinces and are open for adjustment. I believe opinions that are not open for change, even the most adamant of opinions, are simply judgments - now, again, this is my opinion. And while there are many people who are experts in certain fields whose opinions are deserving of being judgments, most opinions are not backed by that kind of knowledge and expertise. Most opinions are just based on what we feel is true. So what I am saying is that these installments will just be editorials like those in newspapers or like Andy Rooney's musings on "60 Minutes". Andy Rooney gets on my nerves, however, I think because he comes off snooty and pessimistic, not qualities that I find amusing, and I think he is trying to be funny; or is he? So if my editorializing gets on your nerves, just skip the entries that begin with "IMO..." and continue to enjoy our family stories and updates. What's wonderful about the human brain is that you never know exactly what it is going to come up with next. Maybe I'll want to shed light on a serious subject that needs attention. But I think I'll most prefer to keep it light and whimsical; it lifts my spirit. Like today...

First up:

IMO... Extra Sugar Free Gum is the Extra Best

This thought crossed my mind today, although not in those exact words. I changed it up some for artistic measure. I was especially tantalized today while waiting at the checkout stand by a flavor I hadn't noticed before: watermelon.

I picked up a pack, and it is delicious, in my opinion, if you like artificial watermelon flavor. You can't really reproduce the wonderfully unique flavor of fresh watermelon. After chewing my gum for a while, my exact thought was, "This gum sure is lasting a long time," which brings me to this topic to kick around. ("This Gum Sure is Lasting a Long Time" didn't seem aesthetic enough for a title, my thoughts are never as articulated as the words I choose to speak; heck, as a mom of four, sometimes the words I speak are jibberish! So I doubt I will ever use the actual thought that piques my editorial interest as a title).

They keep coming up with all these gimmick gums that promise you fresh breath and better dental health, but they only last about 2 minutes before you want to chuck it. They do give you a big burst of flavor in the beginning, but if you like to chew gum and enjoy the flavor for a while, Extra is your best bet. In my opinion, Extra is the best gum out there.

Here's why:

It tastes really good for sugar free gum
The flavor lasts a really long time (20 minutes or more) compared to sugar gums which are devoid of flavor in only a few minutes
And because it's sugar free, it doesn't promote cavities.

In fact, it prevents cavities better than those gimmick gums, in my opinion, because the flavor lasts longer. I'm no expert, but I believe sugar free gum works to prevent cavities when chewed directly after meals because the flavors cause you to salivate a lot, and that saliva flushes out all those plaque causing bacteria in your mouth. There's probably more to it than that, but I will leave you to research that on your own if you need to know.

An oddity of my own which my husband finds particularly amusing and of which I have yet to find anyone who shares it with me, is that while chewing gum, when the flavor is all gone, upon the exact chew that is immediately following that last chew with the slightest hint of flavor, I invariably gag. Sometimes I can chew a few more times after that before I gag again, but I continue to gag, often after every subsequent chew, until I spit it out. It does not matter what type or brand of gum, I still gag, although I do gag more violently with sugary gums, therefore, I don't chew sugary gums! Occasionally, I am not in a position to remove the gum inconspicuously, although if I do not draw attention by spitting out the gum, I will certainly eventually draw attention with my incessant gagging, so I have to sometimes secretly expel it into a piece of paper or tissue. I refuse to turn it into that disgusting ABC gum (already been chewed) that we all have come to know and despise that you step into on hot asphalt and can never completely remove from the bottom of your favorite pair of shoes or equally ghastly, the ones you find stuck to the bottom of just about every desk at school. Usually, I try to keep the gum wrapper on my person, so I have the ability to stealthily tuck it away until I come across a trash receptacle.

Gum chewing is fun and enjoyable and can be good for you. I've read that it can help with your concentration, the theory being that the act of chewing stimulates your brain, the hypothalamus in particular, which releases hormones that keep you alert. So if you feel yourself dozing off at work or in the car, rather than pump yourself full of caffeinated and often sugar loaded sodas or coffee, pop in a stick of gum! Another plus, in true MacGyver fashion, you never know when you might need that ABC gum to help you get out of a locked room that is about to blow up!

The Great Haircut Catastrophe of '08

2008-01-08T23:50:00.000-08:00

(not to be confused with the "Great Haircut Catastrophe of 2000" - that one was with Dallas)

Well, now I am not so sad about not having a camera.

Savanna cut her hair today. Her beautiful, silky fine, honey blonde locks have been chopped to smithereens (sp? - is that a real word or did Yosemite Sam coin that one?) side note: I did a spell check and I had spelled it wrong; I wrote "smitherines." I looked up the etymology, and it is actually from an Irish word, smidiríní, which means fragments, or smithereens. You have now learned your one thing for the day!

Such lovely hair, no more!

The horror!

Oh, the humanity!

Okay. It's not as bad as a zeppelin falling to the ground, but her hair was just so pretty in the cute little bob I cut for her a couple of months ago. I've only ever been able to do boy cuts and some boys have had to suffer some pretty awful cuts while I perfected my technique. But the only time I ever cut a girl's hair was when I cut my sister Catherine's hair when I was in the 11th grade. We were really, really poor that year. It was the year we could only ask for one Christmas gift. I asked for a Bible and got a really nice burgundy leather bound one with gold glittery paint on the page edges and my name engraved in gold on the cover - one of my most prized possessions. So haircuts were a luxury we couldn't afford, and my sister wanted a haircut. I said I could do it. I mean, it seemed so simple: just cut in a straight line. Oh, not so simple, my friend. I was trying to give her the same haircut I gave Savanna. I got almost all the way around her head, went around to the front to check out my symmetry and uttered, simply, "Ooops." Not something you want to hear when you are getting your haircut outside on the patio when there are no mirrors present! Poor kid; it was awful. I somehow was getting shorter as I went around, so it ended up much shorter than she wanted it. From years and years of watching haircuts and doing them on my boys, I have learned the proper technique to cut longer hair (just bobs, nothing fancy like layers). Savanna was my first actual try, though, and I was so proud of how it turned out. It takes me much longer than a hairdresser though. That's why they get paid the big bucks! Dallas's hair can take me up to an hour. He's got so much hair! And he wants it long, so it's tricky how to measure it because you can't use the fingers method.

So I'm not so sad I do not have a camera right now because I do not really want a picture of this. Although I did not cry, so maybe it's not all that bad. Dallas cut his hair when he was about 4 also, must be a rite of passage. When I saw what he had done, I yelled my signature scream of surprise, "Oooooh myyyyy Goooood!" I said the "Oh" with an upwards inflection, then downwards for the "my", then back up again for the "God." Yes, I used the Lord's name in vain, something I am not proud of, but times like these were the only time I did it, and I really was asking God for help to get through it somehow; they were that bad! And they got to know it well and would scatter like cockroaches in the kitchen when you turn on the light. And so after I yelled my plea for help, Dallas knew he was in deep doggy poo. He just looked up at me with his whacked up hair and his big brown puppy dog eyes, and I wept. He cut it so close at the very front of his head, a big clump of it, too, that we had to shave his head so he didn't look like it was whacked off, which it was! It wasn't a buzz cut, either. It was literally all shaved off; we used Dan's electric razor that he uses for his face. I couldn't stop crying over it because I was so afraid the kids at school were going to make fun of him for being bald. He was in the PPCD program which is a pre-school program for kids with special needs, his was speech. But, amazingly, it was just the opposite. The kids absolutely loved it! Everyone wanted to touch it, and Dallas, whose love language is touch, was in his own Heaven. He became very popular and remained popular until he had to leave that school when we moved away. The PPCD kids were helped out by all the grades, so they got to know the whole school, but I think his special "do" got him some extra special notice. It would be nice if that was all it would take to help him get some friends now...

We'll see what Savanna's new "do" gets her. Maybe it's not such a bad thing for your kid to give themselves their own chop job! They're probably going to do it anyway, so I say when they are around 4 years old, accidentally leave out a pair of kid scissors, and let them create their artistic masterpiece! It could be the best thing that ever happened to them up til then, or you could end up in the ER. Use caution taking any parenting advice from me. You'd think with 4 kids, I would know better. Just yesterday, Savanna found the same pair of scissors she used on her hair and had chopped up hundreds of tiny little pieces of paper all over the school room floor. I asked for the scissors; she brought them to me. I gave her a scolding and made her say, "I will not cut the paper." This works well, but you have to be specific with kids. I was specific, too specific. You know kids. For example, Dallas is running one fine day several years ago. I tell him to stop running, so he stops running as fast as he was but then keeps on running, just slower. So I say, "Stop running!", again, to which he replies, "I'm not running. I'm galloping!" Funny story, too true, but he was serious. This is my life around here. You have to be specific! I should have made her say, "I will not cut anything with the scissors." As I am quite flighty these days, I got sidetracked after our little discussion and just set the scissors back on my cluttered computer desk, shoving them underneath something so she couldn't see them in the meantime. By the time I got back to my desk, I had forgotten about the incident and could not even see them amid the mess. I hid them well enough from myself but not well enough from a 3 1/2 year old!

So it was all my fault, this haircut catastrophe, for leaving the scissors out and for not being specific enough in my reprimand. Bad Carrie!!! You should not have left out the scissors! Say, "I will not leave out the scissors."

I will not leave out the scissors... =-(

And I take it back. I am so sad about not having a camera. Upsetting as it was, I love taking pictures, even when they are bad... =-)

Happy Birthday, Daddy

2008-01-01T02:09:00.000-08:00

He would be the big "6-oh" today. Happy birthday, Daddy, and Happy New Year!

Always your daughter,
Carrie Lynn

Ain't Got No Camera Blues

2007-12-27T02:19:00.000-08:00

It's just killing me not to have any pictures of Christmas. My camera broke earlier this month, and we are broke, too, coincidentally. So no camera for me. Thankfully, I was able to take lots of photos with Nelda's camera (my mom-in-law), but I didn't bring any CDs to burn them on. So I will have to wait til next time we visit to get the pictures. I do have video though. I'll have to clip together a little video when I get a chance (still crashing from the usual "after Christmas" let-down).

I made do during Bailey's birthday party by taking video with our little flip camera (you can snap photos from the video), and I broke out my good 'ol 35 mm from way back in the day which coincidentally is also a Canon Powershot like my poor broken camera. My dead camera was 3.1 mega pixels and was our major purchase that year, about 3 or 4 years ago, I think, and that was pretty darn good at the time. It cost us almost $300.

I was just at Wal-mart pricing cameras to see how much I will have to save up to get one, and you can get a 6 mega pixel camera for $85. Wow. They sure have gone down in price. But just like last time, I will get on the net and spend a good while researching to see how I can get the best bang for my buck: the features that are important to me for the least moo-lah. This time around, one of the most important features for me is the shutter lag time. I loved my Powershot; it took some really great, clear pictures, but the shutter lag time and time between shots was a little annoying. When you are trying to get a good shot of all the kids in front of the Christmas tree and you miss that split second money shot when they were all smiling at once - you just want to curse because it ain't gonna happen again. That was it. I keep trying for several minutes more; I always do, but it just ends in someone crying, someone screaming and the rest sighing in agony wondering when it will end!

Image stabilization also would be nice, but I'm not sure if I can get it in my price range. Gotta research! I will have to save up for a few months or more (taxes are due at the end of January, this time of year is always hard for us, especially if I have not done a great job at the budget, as is the case for this year - still not used to having 4 kids), but I would like to spend under $200, might have to settle for less than $150, depends on how I can control the budget. Pictures are precious to me, so maybe I will be motivated to do better this year.

I've already started planning my budget. I have a simple Excel spreadsheet Dan made for me to keep track of expenses and so I am not late on any bills. Email me if you want a copy: carriemays@gmail.com. Although I am sure Quicken or something like that is probably much better because it does the math and all, but this works really well for me. I got a calculator right here. I ain't afraida no math. It is like my Precious Moments bill organizer that I got from the kids' school fundraiser that ran out after December. I made it last for 2 years. In my own makeshift organizer, I print the table for inputting data on one side of card stock paper, then cut another piece of card stock into 2 pieces. I take one of those pieces and hot glue it to the back of the paper on the bottom, so it is a pocket for keeping your receipts and bill statements. I make 12 of them, one for each month, hole punch it and put it in a pocket brad folder, so you have more folder space for other things like stamps for mailing bills, special statements like taxes, etc. It's really nice to have all that stuff handy in a folder like that in case a bill doesn't come in the mail, or if you are like me mail just gets scattered around the house by little gremlins, so you can see the date it is usually due and look at the previous month to get the amount you paid. With 4 kids, right now all that I can seem to do right is make sure the kids are fed like they should be, and I only get that right because I have 4 kids saying "I'm hungry," every few hours. They might not always tell you they've pooped their pants, but they will surely tell you when they're even slightly hungry! Anything else is easily and most surely forgotten unless I have some sort of reminder set up, like my bill book, my Google calendar, the alarm on my watch. My life: crazy and unpredictable. And right now, not being documented with pictures...

I hope to rectify this soon. I'll check back later with my camera research!

Happy Holidays!
and my favorite holiday saying...
Jesus is the Reason for the Season!

Bailey Turns 2 Today!

2007-12-10T20:26:00.000-08:00

We just had a small family party - well, not that small since there are six of us! Bailey is still getting over a cold, but he had some good fun tonight at his birthday bash.

If you have time (about 11 min), here's a video mix (on Google video) of Bailey's 2nd birthday party: Party Video.

I love the look on his face as he watched his lit up cake when we sang happy birthday to him.

He seemed to enjoy himself, and we had fun watching him enjoy himself. We recycled some of Savanna, Dallas, & Noah's old toys, but he didn't care. He's my clean little man; he was sure to pass along his pieces of trash before continuing to unwrap his gifts so as not to make a mess with the wrapping paper. It's really funny if you listen to what Savanna is saying in the background as Bailey opens the gifts. She was there when we wrapped a couple of them. Of course, she was a little jealous, so we gave her a recycled gift as well. You can hear some of Bailey's words - trash, ball, car (go-go), Chelsea (for "dog," our dog's name), and also his screaming to get attention amidst all the chaos. Plus, he ate chocolate cake without making a mess on his clothes or eating area, a HUGE improvement over last year. I'm sorry you couldn't be there, but it was short and sweet, just like Bailey likes (he's little on patience), so enjoy the video!

Happy Birthday, Bailey!

Here's some more photos from the birthday bash:

Peek-a-Boo!

Mmmm, chocolate cake:

A "ba-ba"

A "go-go"

Hello?

Right here, Savanna said, "It's a box of shoes!" We all got a kick out of that comment!

Savanna's gift:

Checkin' out the go-go:

Daddy's girl:

Bye-Bye!

Savanna & Bailey Get Their 1st Haircuts Tonight

2007-11-16T21:02:00.000-08:00

Bailey, almost age 2: I cut his hair first because he was sleepy (bedtime was the best time for this because he is a wiggly little critter!), so he could go to bed. Little kids have commented that Bailey looks like a girl. Adults probably think it, too, but kids are very frank with you. Adding that he carries around a pink "buddy" as his comfort item doesn't help, so I figured it was about time to give him his first haircut. His hair does not grow very fast like Savanna's whose hair was already halfway down her back by age 2.

Check out Bailey's Buddha belly. Rub it for good luck! He eats all day long; he eats more than I do!

Before:

His eyes are still hazel for now, for those of you who voted. They could still turn brown!

Bailey getting his hair cut:

After:

Such long lashes. Why do the boys get them?

Savanna, age 3.5: This is Savanna's first haircut, well, second really, if you want to get technical. I took her to a really inexpensive salon on April 14th (Dan's birthday) to get rid of her split ends since she just turned 3 and had never had a haircut before at all. She loved that and was very good for the hairdresser. I wanted to get it shorter then, but Dan wouldn't let me. Here's some shots from that day:

Savanna has been asking me for a haircut ever since Dan and the boys came home after their haircuts a couple of months ago. Dan wouldn't let me cut her hair before now because he really liked her long hair. He also likes my hair long while I myself would prefer shorter hair. Savanna's hair is so fine that it tangles easily, especially since she is always touching it while she eats and getting food all up in it. She scratches her head and tosses and turns a lot in her sleep, so her hair gets all ratted up. It's so fine that when we try to brush out the massive tangles, her hair breaks off. I have wanted to give her a bob for a long time now, and using the argument about the tangles, I was able to convince Dan to let me cut her hair. I love braiding Savanna's hair. I won't be able to do this anymore, but I have pictures! (from May 11th):

Don't you like that you can see Dallas's beautiful eyes in this picture?

I'm sure I'll get more chances to braid her hair when she gets older. She looks very pretty with her long honey blonde hair, but I can speak from experience - it is soooo high maintenance! And Savanna is not your girly girl. She has 3 brothers!

Before:

Here we go!

Savanna checking out her hair:

It doesn't look like a lot, does it? There was so much breakage from tangles.

After:

The back, after it's been blown dry:

What do you think?

Here's Noah. His haircut is still working for him.

I'm still trying hard to convince Dallas to let me cut his hair! I think he would look a lot more handsome if you could see his big brown eyes.

Maybe if I could get some comments saying whether you like it now or would like to see him in shorter hair. Maybe you can convince him to get it cut or convince me to let him keep it long! (Click on "comments" link below.)

Pics of Cailey Rae

2007-11-15T19:56:00.000-08:00

My neice, Cailey, Candace's daughter.

Here she is smiling at J.C.

Snoozing with daddy, Jody.

Taking a nap. Candace is a frog freak, can you tell?

John's Marching Band Performance and a Labyrinth of Digressions

2007-11-07T09:25:00.000-08:00

Check it out, not the performance from yesterday, but one of their performances of the same routine: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R-ncc4kZ55g - 8 minutes. Dan's little brother John is in there somewhere. He plays trumpet.

We spent the day yesterday in San Antonio at the Alamodome. Why, you ask? To watch John's band perform at the UIL State Championship. It was cool. I wish we could have gotten there earlier to see more, but it would not have been wise. We have four kids, two of them toddlers. Need I say more? Well, if you want or need audio substantiation behind this and many other choices we make in similar situations, I've loaded up the only "picture" I got from the trip. And, yep, that's me laughing myself into tears, literally. It really is true, not a stereotype at all, that insane people laugh a lot, You know, they're coming to take ma away, ha ha, ho ho, hee hee, to the funny farm where life is beautiful, et cetera, et cetera - What is that from, by the way? As usual, I digress. But, seriously, try listening to that full blast for 3 hours and see if you don't go just a tiny bit insane. You can't tune it out. Dan wants to get me an iPod, says it would be worth the investment, but I am skeptical. I can hear it from every room in the house. They can probably hear it next door! Dallas and Noah did none of this when they were small. They were such fine little gentlemen (at least that's how I remember it, but my memory can be a little fuzzy because I also said I would never get pregnant again after Noah because pregnancy was so uncomfortable! Never say never - I really stop myself now before I say never and end up having to change the phrase to hardly ever). This "fuzzy memory" is why I thought it would a good idea to have another, and then Savanna waited until right after Bailey was born to start the screaming. Hmmm. Is there a correlation there? Well, she taught Bailey very well, so now they double team me. She gets that from me. The teaching part. Not the screaming! The first time you hear it, you jump, because the frequency reaches a tiny little section in your brain that is reserved for those special irritants that get your attention immediately, like fingernails on a chalkboard, that "this is a test of the emergency broadcast system...", Dan's favorite: teeth scraping against your fork, bloodcurdling screams - wait - that's what they do! And it really feels like they are poking my brain! God was so wise to give them to us when they are so small and helpless so we can fall in love with them with that forever kind of love or else, well... or else! I can't say why else because I just can't imagine why anyone would hurt children, no matter what they do. That's what the laughter is for! I am possibly one of the most tightly wound people I know. I am almost always like a stack of books that is really high, and it can only hold maybe one or two books. You're not sure though if it's one or two, heck, maybe you've got comic books and can fit ten or so. I should be so lucky. With me, they usually pile on a dictionary! So if I can endure this on an almost daily basis, then anyone can. I can teach you: laugh! It really does help. It drives them crazy though. They don't understand what is so funny. Oh, right, I continue to digress. What was I talking about? Oh, yeah. John's band was awesome, man! The kids liked it, too, which was a plus. Hey, you notice the good times and enjoy them so much more when you suffer sometimes (or lots of times!). Which reminds me, I got a CD from http://www.saintjoe.com/ called "15 Things to Do in the Midst of Suffering" by Jeff Cavins. I haven't listened to it yet, but I wonder if it mentions that. Jeff Cavins' "Great Adventure" DVDs are great also, that's what I went there to get. I saw it in RCIA, but it is so much information so fast, I want to listen to it a few more times, and have Dan listen with me, too. It's a Bible timeline history power packed on 4 DVDs. Great if you appreciate seeing "the big picture."

I have suffered from depression for most of my life, but when I have thoughts of suicide, I pray, actually I have conversations with God and Jesus and it always starts like this: (PAUSE - I don't get to this til the end of the post, I digress many more times, so you might want to just stop here and come back later when we post some family stuff! The following is just some personal journaling I did for me, really, and for others who suffer from depression or know someone who does). Of course, first I am crying. Not just crying. Bad crying. A good cry - yes, crying can be good. In a good cry, your lips tremble first because you are trying not to cry, and then the tears start welling up until finally one falls. You can't count it as a good cry unless you let the tears fall. Otherwise, you are stifling your emotions, which is not good. Stifling too many good cries can turn into a bad cry, the kind of cry you have and think "where did this come from?" In a good cry, sometimes you sob a little, sometimes you don't. A good cry isn't necessarily about anything at all but a compilation of things that you just need to let go. Like when you cry because you dropped the flour all over the floor. It's not about the flour or your clumsiness. And a good cry alleviates pain, never causes pain. You feel better afterwards, not like you are just stopping crying because you don't have any more energy left or because you have to go fix dinner, thus the stifling. When you are this deep into depression you don't just cry. Your body heaves. You have trouble breathing because the sobs are so heavy. You hurt in a place that is not anatomical or else people would be getting that body part removed all over the place, and it is the worst pain you have ever felt. I have had a kidney stone, countless migraines, broken feet, been in many car accidents, and gone through four natural childbirths, yep that's right, no painkillers or anesthetics, just an Enya tape, Dan's hand, and lots of breathing. I'm one of those people more afraid of the big needle in my spine than of a little pain, and if there is a drug-free way to cure something, that's my first choice. Just say No! So of all those painful things I've experienced, depression is the most painful. It hurts your heart. The first time I heard that phrase was from the mouth of a babe. From Dan's brother, John, the same John in the video above, when he was three. Someone did something that hurt his feelings and he said "You hurt my heart." His phrase. Children are the most clever of humans. A child of three knows where his feelings come from without ever going to medical school! When you are depressed, you hurt in your heart. The dictionary says "pain and ache usually refer to physical sensations (except heartache); agony and anguish may be physical or mental," but that is not true. Whoever wrote that has never suffered from depression. It does hurt, very badly. And just like when people who are in great pain wish for death, so do the depressed. The pain fuzzes your brain so much that either you can't remember when you last felt good or you view those memories through skewed lenses, the opposite of rose-colored glasses. Sometimes you dismiss the thoughts of suicide because you realize how much you would be hurting the people that love you. Or if you are feeling like no one loves you, you do not want to make a mess on their floor or worse not die but leave them a vegetable they have to take care of and hate you even more. So I couldn't have met Jesus at a better time in my life because I certainly would not be alive right now and neither would Dallas & Noah & Savanna & Bailey. From one soul to four. I was just reading about rats because we watched the Ratatouille DVD last night, great movie, and one article was about breeding rats. The person writing it said that you should only breed rats to to help better the species, so you don't want to breed rats with defects. Huh? If that's the case, then I shouldn't have had children at all. All the way to age 18 (when I fell in love for the first time), that was my choice. I hardly dated at all, didn't even kiss a boy until I was 17, and the only reason that happened was because this boy was seriously flirting with me. Unbeknownst to me, he flirted with everyone! I mentioned in passing I had never been kissed (ah, the allure of a conquest), and then he became quiet suave and said all the right things, particularly, he greeted me always with, "Hey, gorgeous" with a devilish grin that sold it, even to me who hardly ever ever believed compliments, rare as they were, but always believed disparagement. A boy I had a huge crush on in junior high used to call me flat chested. He also commented frequently about my huge honker. It was torture. Even though I was almost always first chair, which is supposed to be represented by the seating arrangements in an orchestra, I was forced to sit in between him and another kid who was not mean. The object of my affection was usually second and Mark was third. Mark and the meanie (as he will thus forth be known as to protect his identity; he eventually quit orchestra, ending my crush - out of sight, out of mind, out of heart - so not many people will be able to figure out who he is. Like most childhood meanies do, he grew out of it and stopped doing it after junior high.), they were buddies, and geniuses at cutting up. So how does she fix this? By punishing me, making me sit second chair between them. This did not stop them from cutting up. Like I said, they were geniuses, I always fell for the smart ones. Not the lookers that everybody loved. That's too easy. I like challenges. I liked him before he was mean to me, but I didn't stop liking him when started calling me names. For the most part, they stopped cutting up when she was conducting or lecturing but as is the nature of first year orchestra, she was often going over to the violins to give some one on one instruction. They needed it most - oy!. Add to the head splitting noises list: novice violin playing. I originally chose violin but scratched that the first time I played it. It hurt my brain! So it was between cello and viola all the way up to the night we bought my instrument. I would have chosen viola because it was cheaper; I was afraid we couldn't afford the cello. So I told my parents I could not decide, and my dad said he liked the cello which was cool because so did I. Anyway, when she was helping them, the meanie would say things like my nose was in the way, I was as flat as Kansas, etc. ha ha. He thought he was soooo funny. So I would move my fat nose so he could chat with his buddy. It was torture. Pure torture and so unfair. I mean what was the point in even trying out for 1st chair when the only time I got to sit there was at concerts - he got to sit there, the meanie. The injustice. I mean, really, I'd rather have my nose than his, but I never made fun of him. Love is blind.

Now, these things never came up when I was listing all the horrible things about myself when I was depressed. Lucky for me, I don't care what I look like, although I do prefer to be well kempt. I never cared about looks, or else I never would have kissed that boy. He was very skinny, sort of dopey looking actually. He was a kikker which I was not into at the time (this is what you called them fellas that wore cowboy boots and tight jeans and listened to country music, from KIKK, which I believe is no longer a country radio station), and he smoked. So my first kiss was against a pool table in his garage, country music in the background and tasted of carrots and smoke. It was nasty and delicious at the same time, a lovely paradox. Why carrots? He ate carrots because he thought this would get rid of the smoky taste. That doesn't work by the way, in case you are looking for tips on hiding smoke smell. Nothing works, not even brushing your teeth and eating breath mints or chewing gum. It's on your breath and your hair, and especially your fingertips. (Believe me, I know. I might write about it some other time as to why, but I smoked for a couple of years after my dad died). My parents smoked, and I hated it. Every time I opened my backpack, I was greeted by smoke wafting from my satchel. I tried for so long to get them to quit because I loved them and did not want them to die. I even wrote a research paper on the effects of smoking chock full of resources and even photos of blackened lungs; I worked very hard to be sure I would get an A on it, so I would have a reason to make them read it, because I love them. They got mad at me though. Who would have thunk it? That didn't stop me from trying. I didn't think it was a hopeless cause because after I became Christian, it irritated me immensely, like fingernails on a chalkboard, when they said "GD." To me, it was literally like someone was cursing my Father. You mess with my family, you mess with me. Every time they said it, I would simply say "Gosh Darn it!" I was offering them an alternative. This is exactly how I discipline my children, go figure. You do what works without hurting someone, even if they are hurting you. It took a few years, but they eventually stopped doing it. They just said dammit. Still cursing, but a compromise. I'm quite persistent when I want something. It's ironic what they listed as Dad's cause of death: nicotine addiction. It's like I knew. I think God was telling me because He knew how much I loved him, preparing me for what was to happen. My life is such a complex maze filled with twists and turns, and I sometimes keep ending up going down the same path over and over which is okay because I am smarter each time I go that way again and I see something new that I didn't notice before. It's like in RCIA when I was learning about the structure of the mass and the Bible. When you see the "big picture" you have one of those "aha" moments and the thing that was an enigma to you before is now this beautiful thing that you want to keep looking at because you just cannot believe how beautiful it is. Life is beautiful. It's a gift that you are not supposed to return, or you will hurt your giver's heart. Ultimately, this is what saves me from myself when I am suicidal. When my soul is aching, I think of Jesus on the cross (I had to stop just now to cry a little bit, a good cry).

When my soul is aching, I think of Jesus on the cross and of his suffering. He was human, like me. He suffered, like me. But it wasn't his bodily wounds that hurt him. It was his heart that ached. The Sacred Heart of Jesus. He loves all God's children with that forever kind of love, because you loved them from the beginning. The kind you can't get rid of even when your children are hurting you or screaming at the top of their lungs, pushing your "crazy" button. You forgive all those things because your Father forgives you. Study the Theology of the Body some time. http://www.theologyofthebody.net/ Even if you are not Catholic or Christian, it is fascinating. I missed most of the class on that because we had to go to the church to practice something for baptism. My curiosity was piqued, however. It's works like this that explain why Pope John Paul II was pope. I used to think it was sort of awful for the Catholic Church to be so ornate and that the money could be better spent on the poor and needy. But I think differently now. I believe the churches are so beautiful because they are a reflection of the beauty of love. The love God has for us, and the love that we give back to Him, as is spoken about in the Theology of the Body and is represented in the mass and the Trinity, the love that goes back and forth between the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. (Although even the poorest of churches are also beautiful. My favorite church is still the one I went to in Reynosa with my friedn Anna on a missions trip with our church. It was beautiful because you could see God's love reflected in the people, all of them, and when you can see that in the midst of such poverty, it is one of the most beautiful things you will ever see). Oh, boy, I am digressing again. It's one digression after another. But digressions can be a beautiful thing, especially when you are reflecting.

Back to the no dating (I went the wrong way with that, again with the maze metaphor), part of that was because the boys weren't asking but mostly it was because what's the point? I was thinking scientifically, like the rat lady. The point of dating is to find a mate and propagate the species, and I was not planning on propagating. Logically, with my genes, it would not be wise. My favorite class in high school was anatomy. Partly because Mr. Dennison was super cool and mostly because I was amazed by the human body and wanted to figure out what makes it work. My favorite class in college was microbiology (when I was a nursing major, my second favorite was Library Science, ha ha, also science but it was a Children's Literature course). Most people feared microbiology class, it was legend at TWU because it was hard to pass, but for me, it was a breeze because I was so fascinated. I wanted to know all these little bugs that I couldn't see but knew were there. Knowledge really is power and getting to know about something you are afraid of helps you fear it less. I was a self-proclaimed germophobe, I cringed at the sight of door knobs. This first began when we studied pond water in 6th grade life science, or was it 7th grade? Anyhow, before this I was completely unaware of an entire race of beings that were everywhere but we couldn't see. I once revelled swimming in Lake Livingston, but after this, I never did it again. Once I touched a door knob, I could feel the bugs crawling on my hands until I washed them off. Hand sanitizer was invented for freaks like me! I settled down quite a bit after microbiology, but what really cured me was having a baby. You'd think the opposite and that I would get more narcotic - ha ha. Freudian slip? nah! - I meant neurotic! It took me a few seconds to find the word but I kept saying narcotic - it was making me neurotic!!! Babies are so dirty. Dirty, dirty, dirty. But they are also so cute. Cute, cute, cute. And how can I look at something so cute and imagine him covered in all those nasty little bugs? I would go insane, well, more insane. So I gave up. I still wash my hands after every diaper change (Hand sanitizer does not cut it. I can still feel the bugs, they just smell better!), but that's not crazy, that's good sense! But spit up's okay. Not vomit, but spit up is different than vomit, similar to the 3 second rule. The more time it's in there, the more yuck factor.

Well if you've made it this far into this post, then you must really care about knowing me, and I will share with you one of my most private moments that I don't normally share. I am not looking for sympathy, but empathy rather, and to help others who are sad. Misery does not love company, but it helps. I have realized that the more people I tell about depression, the less power it has over me. Plus, it helps to have people who can notice you are getting sad; they often do before I do. Sometimes the downward spiral is gradual, like when I was pregnant with Bailey. Sometimes it is sudden, like after my dad died. There was a time not too long ago when I could not speak 3 words on the subject of my sadness without bursting into tears. It was taboo. People ask, "how are you?" all the time, but we are all trained to say "fine." I usually ponder the question for a bit before I answer while I carefully decide if this is a person I tell the truth or just say"fine" to save them the agony of having to listen to my answer to a question they really didn't want to know the answer to. I am even more careful now that a loaded question like that got me into a lot of trouble and turned my world upside down, twice in fact. Both times, however, the consequences ended up being worth the trouble. Something very bad happened, but then something very wonderful followed, both because of the incidents. I can't wish it didn't happen. So you may want to stop playing with me because I am broken, but I hope that you won't. I suffered alone for so many years, hiding my feelings from most everyone. You do it because you are afraid no one will love you or those that do love you will stop because you are broken, like the toy a kid loves and plays with until it breaks and gets thrown in the trash. I, however, was devastated when my mom threw away my cookie monster because she kept having to sew him back together. Could be why I have clutter issues; I have trouble throwing things away. Could also be why I always root for the underdog, even when they are not so nice, like Tom, Wile E. Coyote (I didn't want them to actually eat Jerry or the Roadrunner; I just wanted them to get to taste victory), or when they are persecuted like Jesus and like the American Indians and the Jews when I would read history stories. Empathizing would leave me in tears. When you suffer alone, you suffer twofold because you do not allow anyone to help you. No one can help you if they do not know. But you will always fear that telling people will make them go away because they do not understand. Some people, as in the case of my first real boyfriend, freak out because you are crying because they just don't know how to deal with you when you are that way. He thought I was crying because of something he did because it was just too odd a concept for him that I did not know why I was crying. His way to get me to stop crying was to cover my face so I couldn't breathe or eventually to hit me (just once). Well, yeah, that works (I never cried in front of him again after he hit me), but it's not the best way to help someone who's depressed. If someone you know is crying a lot for no reason or even for good reasons but a lot, then they might be depressed. What would be better is to find someone who is experienced with depression and ask for help dealing with this person. Then, if you care about this person and want to keep them in your life, read a little bit about depression. It's not that complicated really. Just imagine a time when you felt really sad about something, like maybe when you found out someone you really loved died. Imagine feeling like that all the time with varying levels of sadness, but it just won't go away, no matter what you or anyone else does. I have even been told I like to be sad. What? Who likes to be sad? Yes, sometimes I feel more comfortable being sad, and it is a little tricky coming out of a depression because you feel comfortable with the sadness. Not feeling sad is new, and you have to start learning to act and react differently to things. If you can relate to what I am saying here or know someone who has depression, then you are not alone. You are never alone. Even when you are in the deepest darkest hole, so deep that you cannot see the light anymore, you are not alone. Jesus is right there in your heart, even if you don't know Him or believe in Him. He is the lamp unto your feet, the Light of the World. Go to church, any church that you feel comfortable with, and ask for help. Even if you are not Christian and have no plans on becoming so, you will find help. I used to think that the mass was boring, that people were just chanting those prayers from memory and not really feeling and that if we all pray the same, we must be boring God to tears. It may be that way for some, but it's good to memorize prayers and pray them together. God loves it, He loves the other way, too, and I believe it is part of his plan for us. When you are most desperate and delirious with sadness, it's hard to make words, complete thoughts and sentences. But prayers, just like the ABC song, can become glued to your brain and not escape your mind when most other words do. When you have prayers that you learned when you were young deep down in your heart and mind that you learned when you were most impressionable, these prayers are part of who you are. This is what I hope for my children. Even if they end up in a different religion or no religion, which is highly unlikely but their choice to make, they will have the strongest foundation that I helped lay for them. And who doesn't enjoy or feel a sense of pride when they look at something they helped build, no matter how tiny your part was in the process; even better when others are in awe of your creation. Mom, Dad, look what I did! These prayers are weapons and shields against the demons in your life, whatever they might be. Pray the rosary daily, and it will heal your heart. The sorrowful mysteries are the salve for the depressed. I did not know about the rosary when I had these conversations with God, but I was meditating on the sorrowful mysteries. If Jesus could suffer such grief for His children, so can I. EWTN shows The Holy Land Rosary every day. I have a little booklet called "The Seven Day Bible Rosary" that I got from http://www.presentationministries.com/ (they have lots of little publications you can get for free, well nothing is really free, it is run on donations.) It has all the prayers and a good explaination of how to pray the rosary. So depression makes you want to die, but you really don't want to die. The sickness makes you think you want to die. And you know yourself better than anyone, so you can be pretty good at convincing yourself. When I have a migraine, I beg Dan, seriously, to chop my head off. He never does, though. Immense pain makes you want to die. My first suicide attempt was when I was 12. I became Christian when I was 13, just in time. Here is what God and I talked about, between the gut wrenching sobs. It's amazing my parents never heard me:

Why?
Why can't I die?
It's not fair when there are so many people who want to live.
Why can't you take me and let them live?
It's so unfair.
Please, please, please take me.
I want to be with you so badly.
I love you so much.
If you loved me, you'd take me.
Please, please kill me.
They would all be so much better off without me.
Nobody loves me, I'm a waste of space.
Please take me.
I want to be with Jesus and You.
Please help me.
Make it stop.
Please, make it stop, make it stop.
It hurts so bad, I can't do it anymore.
I'm stupid, and will never be good at anything.
I'm not worth it.
Why?
Why do You love me?
I'm so mad at You for loving me.
I could be free if it wasn't for You.
Why, God, why?
Please, please, please take me.

There is no such thing as an unanswered prayer. God answers all prayers if you listen to him.

And the answer to the questions, why? I didn't know then, but He helped me through it. Sometimes you just need someone to talk to. Talk to God. He is a very good listener. Why does He love me? Just because I'm me. Why do you love your children? Same thing. You will love them whether they are flipping burgers at McDonald's or if they are the one that cures cancer. You will even love them if they are murderers or criminals, because you will never stop hoping they will change. Even the darkest heart can change. And every soul, no matter how flawed the vessel may be, is given the gift of life and deserves a chance to experience life and love.

These conversations would go on for hours, at night, alone in my room except when we had Twinkie. When she diappeared, I was devastated; my depression worsened because she made me feel better. She was a fickle cat, most are. Like Candace and my children, I loved her with that forever kind of love because I also held her when she was a baby. She sat at the foot of my bed, but when I cried, she gently stepped up to my face, licked my tears and then sat there until I finished, periodically rubbing my face with hers. She would let me hold her, pet her, she purred her shaky little purr. Many times it kept me from having a bad cry. Some might say that she just wanted to lick the salt off my face, but I know she was giving me kisses and hugs. She knew I was hurting and wanted to help me. I believe God gave her to me. I picked her because she was the runt; she had a crooked tail. She was the undercat!

I faught so hard with God because I believed that people who commit suicide go to Hell. I no longer believe this. I believe God saves children who are not able to choose Him and the mentally infirm because they also are not able to make healthy choices. God is a loving God and would not punish you for suffering from an illness. I did not fear Hell because I felt like I was already there. My fear was that I would not get to see Jesus. Jesus saves, He really does. Like the song that speaks my heart, "I'm waiting for a another time and another place", but not before it's my time. It's a beautiful song these words are from. It was on a tape an amazing woman made for me of inspirational songs; her name is Julie Hrachovy. Another in the line of souls God placed along my path to help guide my way through this complex maze of life. They have a 30 second clip of the song on Amazon.com, but you should really find a way to hear the whole thing.

I almost forgot the little clip of the kids in the car! Remember, there is no video, just audio. I couldn't see them either, but trust me, they were there! Here you go: clip 1 and clip 2, only 3 minutes each (ha ha: only), for you anyway, this went on the whole way home, for three hours. You may feel the urge to turn it off after the first few seconds, but come on, don't - you can do it! Clip 2 is not as daunting, but it is also not as good, in my opinion. But what do I know? I believe this was taken about halfway back home. This seems like a messy hodge podge when in fact, it was a carefully orchestrated literary masterpiece. HaHa, I'm kidding. I had no clue where I was going with this, but your mind is just like a filing cabinet and when you open a folder, there are index tabs and sticky notes all over the place, so while your studying one thing, you come across something else that demands your attention and then while you're doing that you notice the "also see ___" byline, so you put that folder down and go looking for the other one. But the first folder you see when you open that cabinet, which has nothing to do with your orininal query, grabs your attention, so you start reading that one. You're totally gripped by this subject until you remember that's not what you were there for, so you go back to the one on the floor but leave that one out, so you can finish it later. This is my writing process, but somehow, I manage to tie everything together most of the time. I love that. To come full circle, back to where this labyrinth began, John was the wise little 3 year old sage who put into the best words possible what it feels like to be sad. It "hurts your heart." He's seventeen now and at the same age I was when I suffered one of the deepest, darkest, depressions of my life. I literally faught for my life (with God) almost every night. I cannot imagine John being depressed. It would hurt my heart, and I would want to fix it. I just realized today is the anniversary of my daddy's death. I guess that's where all this is coming from. You can read these lyrics now to change your mood. It's a powerful song. It might make you cry. A good cry.

~~~~~

Another Time, Another Place

by Sandi Patti, duet with Wayne Watson

Album: Another Time, Another Place

I've always heard there is a land

Beyond the mortal dreams of man

Where every tear will be left behind

But it must be in another time

There'll be an everlasting light

Shining a purest holy white

And every fear will be erased

But it must be in another place

So, I'm waiting for another time and another place

Where all my hopes and dreams will be captured

With one look at Jesus' face

Oh, my heart's been burnin'

My soul keeps yearnin'

Sometimes I can't hardly wait

For that sweet, sweet someday

When I'll be swept away

To another time and another place

I've grown so tired of earthly things

They promise peace but furnish pain

All of life's sweetest joys combined

Could never match those in another time

And though I've put my trust in Christ

And felt His Spirit move in my life

I know it's truly just a taste

Of His glory in another place

So, I'm waiting for another time and another place

Where all my hopes and dreams will be captured

With one look at Jesus' face

Oh, my heart's been burnin'

My soul keeps yearnin'

Sometimes I can't hardly wait

For that sweet, sweet someday

When I'll be swept away

To another time and another place

~~~~~

... where there is no sadness...

Cub Scout Pack 345 Fall Family Campout 10/20/07

2007-10-22T06:51:00.000-07:00

We had a blast at our new pack's Fall Family Campout this last weekend. It was at Potter's Creek Park on Canyon Lake which is sort of off a bit between San Marcus and New Braunfels. It was a beautiful weekend for camping. Spending time outdoors with nature was really good for the soul. I saw a shooting star! Well, actually a meteor, but I still like to think of them as shooting stars (more romantic that way). It was the first time I have ever seen one. Apparently, there was a meteor shower I didn't know about early Saturday morning. I saw it on my way back from a restroom break at 5:45am. If I'd known I would have gone out for a look-see - I had trouble sleeping anyway and woke up several times during the night when Savanna would wake up whining a little because she was unsure of where she was. In spite of the little sleep, we had a lot of fun Saturday. The boys went hiking, some went fishing, they earned the Texas badge, the Map & Compass belt loop, the Astronomy belt loop and some of the different dens worked on other things as well. The best part was the treasure hunt (to be explained better later in pictures).

But mainly it was just a nice relaxing campout. I even enjoyed cooking! We got a Coleman propane cooker which was a lot easier than trying to deal with making a fire. It was especially windy Saturday evening, so it came in really handy! We did have a couple of fires made which were great for roasting marshmallows and dutch oven cobblers! I ended up leaving late Saturday evening with the toddlers. I didn't think they (or I) could handle another night trying to sleep outdoors. That turned out to be a wise choice as it was so windy that evening, Dan had a hard time sleeping with all the flapping noises (we forgot the fly to our tent and had to rig a tarp with rope to cover the tent). Plus, since the ground was mostly rock, we couldn't tie the tent down very well; the wind was so hard, the side of the tent just pushed in and kept hitting Dan (he was sleeping on the side where the wind was blowing). He had to take a nap when he got home to refresh before he could watch the Cowboys game at 3. Savanna and Bailey fell asleep within minutes of my starting the trip back home! Toddlers can only take so much camping. Savanna did amazingly well, but Bailey will probably take another good year before he is up for roughing it more than one night. Enough talk - time for pictures!

Here's all our tents. We looked out onto the water that's pictured in the first photo up top. Our family tent is the one a little to the left of center with the blue tarp on top (our rigged fly), and Dallas & Noah's tent is the grey one to the right of center that is about to fall over! The path on the right there leads to...

the pavilion where we cooked and ate meals and gathered together as a pack.

Here's Bailey, Savanna, Dan & Dallas "copping a squat" after breakfast Saturday morning (me too, but I'm taking the pictures). Noah is off on an adventure somewhere with members of his den. There was only one other Webelos there, probably because they went to the Webelos Woods campout the weekend before. So this is Dallas & Dan's second week in a row of camping! Unfortunately, I forgot to send the camera with Dan, so I don't have any pictures from that weekend. I should get Dallas to post a blog about his adventures; Webelos and Boy Scout camping is more "high adventure" than cub scout camping.

Bailey and me

Savanna and me - these are the only photos of me. I handed Dan the camera for a sec. I'm always the picture taker!

Here's the toddlers running back with Dan after I took their picture in front of Canyon Lake. Bailey's running up to get me...

Bailey made it to Mama and grabbed hold! When I was showing him the pictures after I downloaded them, I asked him who was in this picture, and he said, "Mama!" because my hand was in the picture! Notice his scratched up face (he also got a scratched knee). Poor Bailey took a few tumbles. But he took 'em like a man! He has a prominent instep which unfortunately causes him to trip over his feet a lot. Dan says to fix it, he would have to have his feet broken (Noah has one, also - they get it from Dan who has one, too). One of the moms at the campout was telling me about a baby she saw at their daycare that had casts on his legs because he had the surgery to correct the insteps. She said it was so sad watching him try to get around, he was so upset. I don't know if I can do that to Noah or Bailey, but it is hard on them when they try to run. I will have to think long and hard about it...

Savanna and her friend, Desiree, just chillin'...

This is Noah's den leader and treasure hunt mastermind, Homer (in the camo' hat). He's just called all the boys over for the treasure hunt.

Here he is telling the group how to proceed.

Listening closely is Noah's den, Bear den 7, and Bear den 4 also:

The wolves:

The tigers:

Bear den 7 (Noah and Anthony were the only ones there) and Webelos Dallas & (sorry, I do not know the other kid's name, but I will insert it here when I find out!). They are learning how to read a compass and figure out compass headings for the Map & Compass belt loop.

Tiger den figuring out one of the clues that forms their "triangle."

And here they are running up to the next point of the triangle.

The wolves are on the left figuring out their "code." There's Dan on the right with the little ones while I'm running around catching the action.

Here's Bear den 7 off to another compass heading...

Here goes the Tigers - they figured out what the "tube of enlightenment" was - the final point on their triangle. They are off to find the "red tape" to confirm it and get their final clue.

Yeah, Tigers! The first to finish...

Here's the wolves, still deciphering their "secret code"

And here's Bear den 4 off to confirm they are headed to right compass heading...

Here's the Tigers working on their Texas Badge while waiting for the Wolves and Bears to finish finding their clues.

Eureka! Bear den 4 is running back after finding their final clue.

Bear den 7 is back to the start...

trying to figure out their final clue while everyone is waiting patiently =-)

Eureka! They are off to meet with the other dens to put together their clues and figure out the "key" that will unlock the treasure chest.

Putting together the clues...

Working together...

Aha! - the parents have figured it out and are having a blast watching the kids figure it out! Desiree and Gabriel are back there sitting on, um, guarding, the treasure chest!

Eureka! The "key" was P345 - which stands for Pack 345, and led them to the sign hanging at the Pavilion.

There, they find a master lock with a combination of one letter and 3 numbers - P345!

Unlocking the lock...

which opens the treasure chest (there's Savanna in the back running with all the kids - she senses the excitement and wants in on the action!)

What's the treasure???

Ice Cream!!!

Spreading the wealth:

Noah posing with his share of the loot:

Savanna offering Mama a bite:

Bailey offering Mama a bite (I got quite a few bites!) After all that excitement, it was surprisingly quiet as everyone partook in their bounty. A perfect finish!

Here's Greg, the Tiger leader, leading the Astronomy belt loop.

He's asking the boys questions about stars.

And here he is about to have the pavilion lights turned out along with all flashlights and take the boys out to look at the stars. He showed them the halo of light that was San Marcus to the right, new Braunfels to the left, and then behind us, Austin. The moon was really bright, so it wasn't the best time of night for stargazing, but they all got a chance to look at the moon through binoculars to see the craters on the moon.

Here's Noah with his fellow den member and partner in crime for the weekend, Anthony and his brother Gabriel, a tiger. Bad Mama, I forgot to bring the boys' uniforms; they were just about the only ones who did not wear their uniform!

After the stargazing, they all got together around the campfire for skits. I gathered the babies and headed back to Round Rock, and the pack ended the evening with cobbler! What a weekend! Good times. Great memories...

Can't wait for the Spring Campout!!! This weekend the plan is to go visit Dan's family in Katy. His brother John's birthday was the 19th (we missed it for the campout); he turned 17! We'll be taking Monica's car back down there because Dan's mom is buying it for John. We'll once again be a one vehicle family. Back to creative time management! John wants us to go watch him play in the UIL marching band competition. If they place there, they will get to go to the state competition in San Antonio. That should bring back memories; I loved marching band - I was in the color guard in high school my junior and senior year (I played cello in the orchestra but wanted to be part of the marching band also - the best of both worlds!) Then, weekend after that, Nov 2-4, Dallas and Dan will go camping again with Boy Scout troop 345. As Webelos, they get invited to join the boy scouts camping trips so they can start to learn the boy scout way and also to test out the different troops and find the one they fit in with the best. My birthday is the next Friday, and we hope to be able to make it down for Sierra's birthday party that Saturday (she's having a girl/boy party!) She's turning 12, I think. If we can work out the babysitting details, Dan and I hope to have a weekend away the next weekend or possibly some weekend soon after. But the weekend after that is Thanksgiving. We plan on going to Lake Livingston to celebrate with PePa and the rest of the Tipton clan. Seeing everyone again at Nanny's funeral made me realize how much I missed getting together with them. Even though it is a grueling 5 hour drive up there (with 4 kids cramped together in our van), I think it will be worth it, and I am looking forward to seeing everyone again. It will be hard to be there without Nanny, but I know she would love for us all to be getting together again. What a busy month we have ahead of us! And then advent begins, Dan's and my favorite time of year. It's quite possible I will not post again until after the new year!

Cailey Rae, born October 4, 2007

2007-10-07T19:22:00.000-07:00

My newest neice, Cailey Rae:

Born: October 4, 2007
Time: 9:56 a.m.
Length: 19 1/2 in.
Weight: 7 lb. 5 oz.
Parents: My sister Candace & her boyfriend, Jody; their 1st baby.

What defines us?

2007-10-01T23:51:00.000-07:00

Our bodies
Our actions
Our thoughts
Our beliefs
Others' perceptions
Our diseases
Our conditions
Our race
Our occupation
The labels placed upon us by others
Our souls
Our legacy...

What defines who we are?

All of it?

Just one? Or two? Or three?

None of it?

Does it matter?

Are some people just meant to be forever invisible, without definition, besides labels?

Numbers, things, replaceable, forgettable, insignificant, not wanted or needed, without purpose?

What defines us?

Nanny's Funeral - Wednesday, 9/26/2007

2007-09-27T19:24:00.000-07:00

Nanny's memorial service and funeral were beautiful. The preacher that led the services did a wonderful job describing Nanny. He spent some time talking with family to get an idea of who she was. The only thing that bothered me slightly was that he mispronounced Nanny's name every time he said it. Nanny's name was "Alene" pronounced like you would the man's name "Albert." PePa often called her "Al." My other grandmother's name was "Aileen," and he pronounced her name like it was spelled that way. Nanny probably would have corrected him! Other than that, though, his words were moving. It was sad yet comforting at the same time to know she is at peace in Heaven. Right before the service began, PePa handed my mom Nanny's wedding ring. This was emotional for all of us because Nanny always wore that ring. When I think of Nanny's hands, hands so beautiful because of all the love she shared with them, I always see that ring on her hand, whether she is cooking, doing dishes, shelling peas, working a word find, or embroidering something for a family member. She often spoke about how she would be giving that ring to Mom when she died. I hated to hear her speak about that because it made me sad to think of Nanny dying, but you could tell it was very important to her that Mom have it. She told so many stories about her ring, how they got such a good deal on it and how much she loved the white gold and the setting. It was hard to see it off of Nanny's hand, but I will always remember Nanny's hands.

This is the program from Nanny's memorial - Tammie said they chose this picture because the chair reminded them of Nanny's chair she sat outside in at their home on Lake Livingston. Nanny would sit outside almost every evening to relax. I love their choice; Thomas Kinkade is my favorite artist. I have over 20 jigsaw puzzles of his paintings, and one of my most prized possesions is an authentic print I have of one of his paintings Dan got me for my birthday a few years ago. It brings me joy in my heart just looking at his artwork. He is the "Painter of Light". Nanny was truly a light in our lives in this world, and now she is a light in Heaven shining her love down upon us...

This is a picture of some of the roses from Nanny's spray that draped her coffin. It was the most beautiful flower arrangement I have ever seen. I kept one rose for each of my children; they are drying upside down in my kitchen right now. Dallas found the butterfly on one of the other arrangements and wanted to keep it:

Afterwards, we went to lunch with some of the family to Luna's Mexican Restaurant in Baytown. We sat outside on the patio and enjoyed talking, especially about Nanny and our memories of her. My mom and her brother Mark were there plus his 3 kids Bryan, Tammie, and Alicia who was there with Bryant also. Catherine and Amber were there, and so was Dan and Dallas (We had all 4 kids with us at the viewing the night before. Dan's mom kept Savanna, Bailey, and Noah for us. We gave Dallas and Noah the option to come to the funeral.) Colby & Terri's daughter, Amie, was there also with her husband, Travis, and thier daughter, Gracie. It's so weird how so many of us have 3 year olds. We could start our own playgroup! Nanny would have loved to see them all playing together.

Here is a picture of my mom with Uncle Mark outside of Luna's. He's giving my mom the bunny ears. Mark is a character! I was especially amused listening to him take his order. He didn't choose a meal but rather told the waitress exactly what he wanted on his plate! We joked that he must have been flirting with the waitress or slipped her some cash because he got his meal 10 minutes before anyone else did!

I'm glad we all went out together. We had fun; Nanny would have liked that.

That's My Nanny

2007-09-25T08:10:00.000-07:00

I wrote this poem for her just now, to put in her coffin. After thinking about Nanny all weekend the words just flowed from my fingers. I know Nanny was the Angel on my shoulder as I wrote this. We are about to leave for Baytown where Nanny born (when it was called Goose Creek), where she will be laid to rest...

That’s My Nanny

Let me tell you about Nanny, this lady so fine
A sister-wife-mother-friend-grandmother of mine
She was kind, loving, special and unique
Still no one has matched her cooking technique

She loved with her words and her giving nature
In ways and amounts you cannot measure
She wasn’t complex nor was she simple
She was just plain “good people”

Her personality was magnetic
She was driven, energetic
You could not stop her when her mind was set
What Nanny needed, she would get

But she used these powers for others, for good
Right next to you is where she stood
When you needed a friendly hand to hold
She was there, as good as gold

She wasn’t graceful, but who needs grace?
She made up for it with her loving embrace,
That hug, that kiss
That’s what we’ll miss

When you needed her, Nanny was there
With her crisp blue eyes and her silver hair
We knew her laugh, we knew her smile
The ribbon in her hair - her very own style.

Most of all, Nanny was true
The best little old lady I ever knew
Her knack for straightforwardness was certainly uncanny
But that’s alright; that’s my Nanny.

Love always, Carrie Lynn

In Memory of my Nanny

2007-09-23T14:14:00.000-07:00

ALENE FAY HENSON TIPTON passed on to Heaven on Saturday, Septmeber 22, 2007 after 81 years on Earth. She was an affectionate daughter, a fun-loving sister, a brilliant violinist, a devoted wife, a skilled hairdresser, a doting mother, a fun aunt, a talented embroideress, the best mother-in-law, a true friend, and a warm-hearted grandmother and great-grandmother. I am thankful for every moment I was allowed to spend with her and my PePa. Today, I can look into Nanny's crisp blue eyes in the eyes of my mother and of my daughter, Savanna.

She leaves behind her husband Clyde E. Tipton, "PePa," as he is affectionately called by his grandchildren & great grandchildren; daughter Chris Fowler and her children Carrie, Catherine, & Candace; son Mark Tipton and his children Alicia, Tammie, & Brian; son Colby Tipton, his daughter Tiffany and his wife Terri, their children Brent & Amie; and numerous great grandchildren. I do not know all of their names, but before her mind was ravaged by Alzheimer's, Nanny knew each and every one of her children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. Since I was a very little girl, I got a birthday card from my Nanny every year, and as many grandchildren & great grandchildren as she had, she still sent birthday cards as long as she was able to. She loved her entire family. Nanny's love languages were gifts and service. She showed her love with birthday cards, Christmas presents that she picked out herself, and her delicious down home cooking. Thanksgiving is still one of my favorite times of year, thanks to all the warm childhood memories I have spent at Lake Livingston around family and great food. Some of the best times of my childhood were spent with Nanny & PePa during the summer when Mom & Dad would let me go stay a week or two with them. Nanny would take me with her every time she went to town, and we would either shuck corn or shell peas together in the evenings, whatever was fresh out of PePa's garden. And she made the best jellies and hot sauce from all that fresh produce, but my favorite of all was her dewberry cobbler, fresh from the wild vines. This is how I remember Nanny:

We are blessed to be part of her family and rejoice for her now as she has been freed from her earthly body, and her soul lives on in Heaven. We love you, Nanny. You will live on in our hearts for all our days on Earth, and we will all be together again soon.

Thinking of Nanny brought me to my picture archives as I reflected on Nanny and her life. Forgive me, I might be wrong on some of the dates. Here are some of the pictures I dug up and scanned of this beautiful lady:

Alene Fay Henson, born July 25, 1926; pictured here about 1 yr. old:

I don't know the date of this one, but she looks gorgeous, doesn't she?

October 26, 1948 with daugher, Chris

Clyde and Alene a.k.a PePa & Nanny:

1952. Nanny (26) with Mark (3) and Chris (4), (my mom). Next picture is of PePa with the kids. They must have taken turns taking pictures.

The next 3 photos are from April 1958, Nanny, 31, with her 3 children, her 2nd generation; Colby Lee, Chris Delaine (my mom), and Mark Wynn. I'm guessing it's Easter Sunday since Colby's holding a bunny!

This picture looks like it might be the late 60's or early 70's. Nanny always loved chihuahuas. I wonder if one of these is Sugar.

These next 2 photos are from either late 1973 or early 1974. Nanny, 47, is holding newborn Carrie (me!), and sitting to your left is Alicia who was born August 1973, and Tiffany is to your right. She was born November 1972. Tiffany is Colby's daughter, Alicia is Mark's daughter, and I am Chris's daughter. So Nanny is holding the 3rd generation of her family.

This is Nanny (about 52) and me at her and PePa's house on Madison in Baytown. Before they moved to the Lake we would spend Christmas Day at their house. I'm guessing this is 1978 or '79:

Christmas 1980? This is Nanny (about 54) with me on the right and Catherine on the left. The next pic is of us with PePa.

Nanny's wearing the same shirt here, so it might be from the same night. There's thier Datsun truck in the background. PePa was a loyal Datsun owner until they got bought out by Nissan, and then he switched to Nissan!

That's Catherine on the left, me on the right, and baby Candace is in Nanny's lap. I don't think this is Christmas because we always got dressed up for Christmas, but there is presents and wrapping paper... I'm thinking this might be a double birthday party for Catherine's 4th and Candace's 1st birthday, so probably March 1982:

Christmas 1981 or '82? Nanny with the grandkids at their house on Madison. Uncle Mark is holding somebody's baby doll. From left to right - me, Alicia, Catherine, & Tammie:

Christmas 1983. Nanny holding my sister Candace.

All 9 (living) of Nanny & PePa's grandkids at Christmas 1983. From back left clockwise: Candace, me, Tiffany, Alicia, Amie (in Alicia's lap), Tammie, Brent, Catherine, & Brian.

Going by how old Candace looks here, I'm guessing this is Christmas 1984. L-R: Catherine, baby Candace, & me. Looks like their house in Baytown.

Nanny with Tiffany, not sure of the date.

Nanny with some grandkids in front of their travel trailer at Lake Livingston; from top left clockwise: me, Candace, Alicia, Nanny, Brian, Catherine, & Tammie. Candace looks about 3 or 4, so I would guess 1984 or '85:

Another picture taken the same day with Nanny and PePa:

Here's a couple more pictures from that same day, with Candace and my dad. I think the cat is Stubby; he had a stub for a tail, and he was either Missy's sister or son. They had Missy for a very long time, over 10 years, I think. She was a pretty orange and black calico. Nanny's probably checking Stubby for fleas. She would grab a cat or dog in the evening and sit on the swing and pick the fleas off & kill them - a futile effort since there are so many fleas there, but it seemed like it was relaxing for her.

Dad loved Nanny & PePa like a mom & dad, and they loved him like a son.

My dad passed away 9 years ago. Nanny loved him very much, and I think Dad thought of her like a Mom, too. They are together in Heaven now. We will all be together again someday in Heaven if we believe in God and Jesus as our Lord and Savior. How do I know this?

I Thessalonians 4:13-18

{4:13} And we do not want you to be ignorant, brothers, concerning those who are sleeping, so as not to be sorrowful, like these others, who do not have hope.{4:14} For if we believe that Jesus has died and risen again, so also will God bring back with Jesus those who sleep in him.{4:15} For we say this to you, in the Word of the Lord: that we who are alive, who remain until the return of the Lord, will not precede those who have fallen asleep.{4:16} For the Lord himself, with a command and with the voice of an Archangel and with a trumpet of God, shall descend from heaven. And the dead, who are in Christ, shall rise up first.{4:17} Next, we who are alive, who are remaining, shall be taken up quickly together with them into the clouds to meet Christ in the air. And in this way, we shall be with the Lord always.{4:18} Therefore, console one another with these words.

If you have any questions about heaven, Randy Alcorn's heaven is a good read.

Thanksgiving dinner 1985. Mmmm... makes me hungry just looking at it! My Nanny could cook...

Christmas 1985 or '86, I believe, at Nanny & PePa's house on Madison in Baytown. This is all of Nanny & PePa's 9 living grandkids - the third generation (Colby & Terri had a son, Jaime I believe was his name, that passed as a newborn. Nanny's probably met him already, I do not know what year he was born). Back to front, left to right - Carrie, Catherine, Tiffany, Alicia, Candace (in Alicia's lap), Tammie, Brian (with the big open mouth smile), Brent, & Amie:

Christmas 1888. Nanny & PePa's 3 kids: Mark, Chris (my mom), & Colby on the gazebo PePa built at Lake Livingston. Those lights stayed on the gazebo year round, but they were only lit up at Christmas!

Thanksgiving 1989 - mmm... that's the bird and Nanny's famous dressin', and the picture below that is my mom with her mom on the couch in the living room of the add-on my PePa built onto their travel trailer (I changed it to black and white because there was an orange hue to it. I must have exposed the film somehow because all the pictures on this roll are like that)...

Christmas 1989. Mom crocheted this blanket; I picked the colors. It was originally supposed to be for me, but once Mom started making it, I didn't care for the color scheme so much. So she gave it to Nanny. I like it now - funny how your tastes change over the years. Mom loved to crochet afghans, and she gave lots of them to Nanny so everyone would have nice warm covers in the winter (no heat!). Nanny probably had over a dozen of them...

Christmas, 1990.

Christmas 1991, I think. Dad is being silly, and I'm wearing a ribbon in my hair like Nanny. Sometimes I would swipe her ribbons!

Nanny liked to wear jingle bells at Christmas (she's Mrs. Claus), and PePa always wears the Santa hat - he passes out the presents. Nanny's next to me, Catherine's behind her, and Colby is to the far right.

Here's all 9 of Nanny's living grandkids on the gazebo, back to front, left to right: Tammie, Alicia, Catherine, Brian, Brent, me, Tiffany, Amie, & Candace.

May 1992. Nanny is in Houston to watch me graduate. She went to all her grandkids' graduations and had our graduation pictures on the wall of their tiny trailer home. Nanny could not fit a lot of pictures on her wall, but she and PePa were very proud when we graduated.

Not sure when this is, but I would guess between '92 & '95. Nanny is in my parents' back yard in Houston when we lived at 8211 Ivan Reid. She looks pretty in that royal blue. Nanny loved to swing. Almost every night at the lake, she would either be on a glider or a swing relaxing after a long day's work - Nanny was a hard worker, either helping PePa with the garden or doing daily housework. It was quite a job keeping the dirt and dust out of a house downwind of a sand bank! So Nanny deserved her relaxing swings at the end of the day...

Probably also between '93 & '95 since Teddy Bear's in the pic (the tiny brown dog). Nanny is holding Shadow, one of her favorite dogs.

May 1995. Nanny is in Houston for Catherine's graduation. From left is me, Candace, Mom, Catherine, Dad, Tiffany, and Nanny. Dan is taking the picture.

Then someone returned the favor and snapped a shot of Dan & me. We had been dating one year.

Late Spring, 1996, I think, because I am holding a picture Dan & I had taken together that I was giving to Nanny (that's Dan's and my legs to the left - I remember that shirt of mine!) It was our engagement picture.

July 27, 1996. Dad giving me away at my wedding; Nanny is watching in the background sitting next to Mark.

Someone switched seats because here's Nanny next to Mom watching with a smile as Dan puts the ring on my finger. I bet Nanny switched seats because she had her own disposable camera taking pictures. Nanny always had her own little camera to take pictures of everything from graduations to weddings to Christmas...

Dan and me with Nanny and Dan's grandmother Betty. Dan's other Granny Mary was still alive then, too, but she was too sick at the time to come to our wedding. My other grandmother wasn't there because she passed when I was an infant. Her name was Fay Aileen. She went by "Aileen." Isn't that such a coinicidence that both my grandmothers had the same names, different spellings? They used to play together when they were kids never knowing they would have a daughter and son who would marry. My mom and dad were both born in 1948, the year Goose Creek, Pelly, and Baytown (the "tri-cities") merged to form Baytown. Dad was born January 1st when it was still Goose Creek, and Mom was born August 11th after it changed to Baytown. They went to the same schools all while they were growing up but never met or knew each other until they were set up by their married friends after Dad got out of the Navy. Our family is full of coincidences like this!

Dec. 14, 1996. My baby shower for Dallas hosted by Mom & Dad's friend Karen Brannon. Nanny is watching me open the present from my Mom; Mom sewed baby blankets for him. This one I'm holding was his favorite.

Here we are playing a game at the shower. That's Nanny's grape soda on the table - Nanny loved her grape soda (and strawberry Crush)! (My sister-in-law Monica & her daughter Sierra are next to me).

Nanny at Christmas with her trademark jingle bell (I don't know what year this is from because she almost always wore a jingle bell:

January 1997. Nanny and PePa meet newborn Dallas, our first baby. These pictures were my pre-scrapbooking days. They were in a photo album Dan's grandmother got for us where you put the pictures inside a big sticky-page. I hope it's acid free; I didn't want to open it and take the pictures out because I wasn't sure if they would stick back, so I just scanned the whole page. Nanny was a scrapbooker before us all. She saved lots of pictures from her childhood and from her own children's childhood and had many albums of the grandkids visiting on holidays also. I loved to look through Nanny's albums, especially when we did it together, and she told me stories about her family. You could tell how much she loved her family by the way she talked about them, especially her Daddy. I wish I could remember all the stories...

April 5, 1997. Alicia's baby shower for her daughter, Kayleigh.

Summer 1997. Me, Nanny, PePa holding Dallas. My mom, Chris, holding Alicia's daughter, Kayleigh.

Uncle Mark; his daughter, Alicia holding her daughter, Kayleigh; my dad, Mike and me holding baby Dallas. Thank you, Alicia & Tammie for giving me these pictures, especially this one with Dad hugging me. I miss him very much, but I know he is happy in Heaven also.

Christmas 1997. Nanny holding her first great grandbaby, Ethan. (She's sitting at the picnic table my dad built for them).

Here's the spread for Christmas 1997, and there I am pregnant with Noah and holding Dallas, the 2nd grandbaby. Once grandbabies started popping up (or out, rather!), Nanny bought gifts for the great grandkids instead of the grandkids. And still, she always bought the presents herself thinking about each kid when she did it. Nanny's presents were always special. Sometimes she even bought them with stamps she saved from the grocery store (Nanny was quite frugal, she never blew money) - like the Samsonite toiletry case she got for Alicia, Tiffany, and me one year. She was very proud to be able to give us that because they were really nice; she saved a lot of stamps! She told us she was giving us the first piece if we ever wanted to add onto it for more luggage (since we were almost old enough to graduate soon). Nanny never put on airs - if she got a good deal on something she told you about it. I think that's where I got that from. When people tell me I have something that looks nice, I always have to say where I got the good deal and how much I paid for it. It's not often people brag about getting something cheap, but Nanny taught me that!

April 1998. Kayleigh's 1st birthday party at Lake Livingston. The babies and toddlers pictured here are Nanny's 4th generation thus far on this date. From left to right back row: Alicia; James who is holding his newborn daughter, Amber, with his wife & my sister, Catherine, who is standing next to him; my mom, Chris, is holding Dan's and my newborn son Noah, Nanny, PePa, and Dan. Sitting on the table left to right: Ethan, my cousin Tiffany's son; Kayleigh, Alicia's daughter; and Dallas. The newborns, Amber and Noah, are 2 weeks apart. I was taking the picture!

Nanny & PePa have lots of great grandbabies. I will try to list them all that I know of in order of their grandchildren:

Colby Lee Tipton with Vicki Hoffpaur (sp?) (div.)
-----Tiffany Tipton m. Dennis Durdin (div.)
. ----- Ethan Kyle and Allison "Allie" Faye Durdin

Colby Lee Tipton m. Terri
-----James "Jaime" Edward Tipton (dec.)
-----Brent Lee Tipton m. Carley (div.)
-----Amie Tipton m. Travis Eiland
. ----- Gracie Claire Eiland

Mark Wynn Tipton m. Margaret Anne Lannou (div. 1996)
-----Alicia Kay Tipton with Bryant Stephens
. ----- Kayleigh Mylnn and Kaylnn Alyse Stephens
-----Tammie Leigh Tipton with Christopher Paul Motley (sep.)
. ----- Krista Paige, Kyleigh Shea, and Kayson Wynn Motley
-----Brian Edward Tipton
. ----- Brianna Tipton, Brooke D'Shea Tipton, Brittany, and Hannah Elizabeth Tipton

Chris Delaine Tipton m. Michael Ray Fowler (dec.)
-----Carrie Lynn Fowler m. Daniel Ray Mays, Jr.
. ----- Dallas Michael, Noah Gabriel, Savanna Rayne, & Bailey Donovan Mays
-----Catherine Michelle Fowler m. James Fuller (div.)
. ----- Amber Nicole Fuller
-----Candace Delaine Fowler with Jody
. ----- Cailey Ray due very soon

This list needs work! I hope to make it more complete.
...it's been updated: Thank you Aunt Terri & Alicia for helping me make this list more accurate & complete.

April 1999. From a scrapbbok page of Noah's 1st birthday party at the lake.

Summer 2001. Nanny & PePa with Dallas & Noah; next pic with Dan and me also.

Here's those pictures on one of my favorite scrapbook pages:

Jan 2004. Visiting Nanny & PePa with Noah & Dallas. I'm pregnant with Savanna here.

October 10, 2004. Savanna meets PePa and then Nanny. Savanna loves them right away (although PePa took his teeth out after this and scared her half to death!)

I love the way Savanna is touching her face.

Savanna listens to Nanny talk to her.

October 11, 2004 with Dallas and Noah on the gazebo at the lake:

I am sorry that I did not get to visit her these last couple of years. I have already grieved for her in my own way, as I was very saddened by how much Alzheimer's had taken away from her. I wish I would have taken Bailey to meet her; I know she would have liked him whether she knew who he was or not. I am so sorry that I let my own selfish sadness stop me from doing that. Alzheimer's is such a mean disease. I am glad for her, that she is free now. I am happy, and I am sad at the same time. I love Nanny. I know she loved me and all her family, even when some went through bad phases. She didn't hold a grudge with the people she loved. She was a special and unique person who gave of herself as long as I knew her. I hope someday my family wants to surround me at Thanksgiving and Christmas and summers the way hers did for her. Nanny was one of a kind...

Mays School Starts Today

2007-08-27T07:38:00.000-07:00

I meant to start our home school a couple of weeks ago, so we could take a fall break. It's so hot outside they don't like to play outside too much unless there is water involved, so I figured we could start school and then give them a couple of weeks in the fall when it's cooler to have more outdoor fun like going to parks or taking a family camping trip. But then we all got sick, and Dallas got very sick, so we had to delay. We might still have a fall break and just keep school open when RRISD would normally be off in the winter, but that's the great thing about home school. You can just go with the flow and do whatever you want!

I hope to post soon about how things are going with our school. I'm thinking of letting them write their own posts periodically about what they are learning in school. (That would be a composition and grammar assignment in disguise!) They would probably really like that!

I'm off to get the kids up for our first day of school!

Yay! Popcorn Show & Sell is OVER!

2007-08-25T21:33:00.000-07:00

Dallas & Noah sold a little over $1000 of popcorn for our pack!

Last year, they sold $840, but then the pack ran out of popcorn before S&S was even over. But our popcorn kernal ordered more popcorn this year, so we talked to the boys, and they set their goal together to sell $1000. I totally believed they could do it. However, I worried a little when we had 2 different colds go through our family during that time, and Dallas had a pretty bad asthma episode and came down with pneumonia. It would be understandable if they didn't meet their goal, but they pulled it off after only 3 weeks. They put in over 20 hours of selling to accomplish it which is equal to a part time job! Because they worked so hard in the face of adversity, we decided to let them stop selling after meeting their goal. We gave away a prime selling location for tomorrow so another scout could get closer to their goal. I am so proud of our boys and Dan for taking them out there.

Way to go Dallas & Noah!!!

Popcorn: First weekend

2007-08-12T23:50:00.000-07:00

They sold $260.
Pretty good, I think...
Dallas has pneumonia.
I missed my baby sister's baby shower. =-(

Noah had to sell by himself half of their time, and he was lost without Dallas to "reel them in." (Noah is the "closer.") Dallas says, "Popcorn! Get your popcorn!" And when they come over, Noah tells them all about the popcorn matter-of-factly. It works for them.

We had a cold passing between us for the past week, and Dallas must not have been over it. His asthma is induced by viruses and sometimes is worse than other times, usually if he gets 2 colds close together, but I think the cold last week and then having him out in this unbelievably hot weather and whatever allergens are in the air spurred his asthma this time. He was coughing badly Saturday evening and feverish, so we took him to the clinic today. When Dallas just lies around in bed, it worries me because every time he has been that way, it turns out to be pneumonia. So I don't waste a minute getting him to the Dr. or ER when he gets that way.

Pneumonia can get bad really fast, especially when you have asthma. I have never had it, other than a mild case of bronchial pneumonia, so I don't know what it feels like but it must be bad to get Dallas down. He keeps right on trying to play even when he has the dry heaves and shivers (in between episodes, of course), so pneumonia has to be bad. He says his lungs hurt and that he feels "rattling" in his chest. But he got some antibiotics, some Advair, and we started him on the Albuterol nebulizer right when he started the coughing (We keep that stuff on hand for times like this. Asthma episodes come up really fast like this, so you have to keep the inhalers around even though he is perfectly normal most of the time, and this happens maybe once or twice a year. You just never know when or how bad it is going to be.)

Needless to say, school is not starting tomorrow as planned.

I'm already tired. Maybe scheduling a whole lot of popcorn sales at the beginning is not such a good idea. But who could have known? Maybe I should have known. Why fill my plate more than it already is? Chaos follows me closer than a cat chasing a mouse. I feel like the mouse...

The Library

2007-08-09T21:49:00.000-07:00

I love the library, always have. Here is where my love for the library came from:

Time Warp ~ ~ ~ ~ @@@ ~ ~ ~ ~ to my 3rd grade homeroom period:

Mrs. Brenda Ross was my math/homeroom teacher, and every day after lunch and recess, she would read aloud to us, her in her chair, and us lined up on the steps to the library as if they were bleachers. Our school was testing out "open concept classrooms." There were no walls around any of the classrooms except for the kindergarten, music, art, and gym. The round shaped library was the centerpiece of the school. It dropped down several steps so that it was like a "soup bowl." All the grade levels surrounded the library, and you walked the hallway around the soup bowl to get to your area. The back of the classroom had large portable closets where coats and school supplies were kept in, and this was the "wall" separating the classroom from the hallway of the library. So all you had to do was peek around the closet and you could look right into the library. The other "walls" were made up of chalk boards and bulletin boards which you could also see underneath when you were seated on the floor. And there was a row of bookshelves at the back where textbooks and other books were kept that acted as the 4th wall, except it was a short shelf and you could see right into the classrooms across and around you. It was not as loud as you might think, and for someone who multi-tasks pretty well and likes to see other stuff going on because the class was boring, it worked great for me. But since I was often not paying attention to what I was supposed to be paying attention to, I had my name on the chalkboard with checks next to it (for multiple offenses). Three checks and you're out. I knew the principal pretty well!

So once we were settled in our "bleachers," Mrs Ross would pull out the book, a Bluebonnet contender for that year. It was my favorite book that she read to us, called A Dog Called Kitty, but I also loved the Soup books, very funny =-) I was so inspired by Mrs. Ross and her belief in me even though I was mostly a cut-up and by her gentle way of getting into the hearts and minds of her student, that I decided that semester that I wanted to be a teacher when I grew up. And that dream is finally coming true for me. She was only my teacher for one semester because she was blessed with a baby girl, Allison, and she took the rest of the year off to be a mother. I was heartbroken even though I probably would have done the same thing. Poor me... Not really, it was poor Miss Fink. First, because her name was Miss Fink, and secondly because she had a tough act to follow. Being only 8 years old, I blamed her for taking over Mrs. Ross's class, so needless to say, I was a naughty little girl. But I wrote letters to Mrs. Ross all the way through college and invited her to my wedding (which she was going to come or, but something came up last minute, so I haven't seen her in a long time.) That type of relationship does not happen often, but it is very special when it does. And as their mother teacher, I will get to have all sorts of wonderful moments with my children. Even had I not initiated correspondence with Mrs. Ross, the memories of her had made their impact on who I was, how I felt about reading and books, and the type of teacher (and person) that I wanted to be. It's over 25 years later, and I still think of her fondly and know that she influenced much of my character and also influenced the (good) choices I have made which brought me to where I am today: a home schooling Mom. I can do it! I really can do it. With God's help and guidance, I can help mold these beautiful souls into giving, loving, intelligent, and hard working individuals who will have a thirst for life and all that it has to offer them and those whom they touch. As much as I will be feeding their minds and souls, they will be feeding mine as well, the cure-all for all that ails me. This reminds me of the perfect song written by Gary Chapman, sung by Amy Grant. I listened to it over and over in high school when I would feel down and somewhat worthless. And many times along this journey towards home schooling I have felt like maybe I can't do it, and also keep a clean house, and feed and clothe 6 people on a budget, and continue to be the leader for Dallas's Webelo den. I know I'm not a super mom and probably never will be. I am in awe of the super moms that I know; they are very special people. But sometimes when I compare myself to others, which I shouldn't, I forget that I am special in my own right, with my own talents and abilities, and best of all, God loves me exactly as I am, good and bad, strengths and weaknesses, & virtues and faults. I'll end here with the song, the words are a perfect ending. It's a tear-jerker (if you are like me)...

Here's a clip.

" All I Ever Have To Be "
Amy Grant/Gary Chapman
album: Amy Grant: The Collection

When the weight of all my dreams

Is resting heavy on my head,

And the thoughtful words of help and hope

Have all been nicely said.

But I'm still hurting,

Wondering if I'll ever be

the one I think I am .

I think I am.

Then you gently re-remind me

That You've made me from the first,

And the more I try to be the best

The more I get the worst.

And I realize the good in me,

is only there because of who You are

Who You are...

And all I ever have to be

Is what You've made me.

Any more or less would be a step

out of Your plan.

As you daily recreate me,

help me always keep in mind

That I only have to do

What I can find.

And all I ever have to be

All I have to be

All I ever have to be

Is what You've made me.

The Mays Eclectic Home School Curriculum

2007-08-08T13:27:00.000-07:00

I am posting what I have planned out so far for their school days starting next week - mostly so I can have a place to go for some links I visit regularly! (My favorites folder is ridiculously cluttered right now.) I was planning on starting school this week, but I got Savanna into the Round Rock swimming lessons at the last minute, and they just ended today. I will most likely add/subtract some things as needed. It has taken me months to plan and compile all of this, so hopefully it won't need too much tweaking; but when I was in college, I was told as a teacher, you will make at least one decision (however most probably several), all of them important, every minute of your working time. We do this as parents also, but your role as parent also includes being their teacher whether you are homeschooling them or not. By homeschooling, instead of a stranger having so much influence over my children's lives, it will be me. What a responsibility! And what a blessing to have the opportunity...

I based their curriculum on the Charlotte Mason philosophy for classical education as well as from the book The Well-Trained Mind: A Guide to Classical Education at Home by Susan Wise Bauer and the Core Knowledge Sequence (you might know it as the "What Your N-th Grader Should Know" series by E.D. Hirsch, Jr. If you frequent Half-Price Books, you are sure to come across the one you need eventually, in the home education section.)

One of the first places I visited on the web was Mater Amabilis, a Catholic Charlotte Mason community, which I heavily based their daily schedule on. The CM and WTM philosophies are centered around good literature and the curiosity of the child. Because Dallas has Asperger's (the reason we decided to home school in the first place - the public school special education department at our school was not helping him sufficiently rather changing his personality from a happy-go lucky nature to one of frustration and grumpiness - although to be fair, it is not their fault, it is a very challenging job to educate children in a 20 to one ratio without adding Asperger's or ADHD into the mix, and theirs is a very diverse pot), I may not be so heavy on the writing as is usual with classical education, but I think he will be much more successful in his writing than he was in public school. With so much one-on-one instruction, he may surprise me though!

Notebooking - This is a major component of the CM and WTM curriculums. The student keeps notebooks for each subject for reference and documentation. I will have hard proof of their learning progress should I ever need it also!

Daily Subjects:
Math - 30 min - Math-U-See - a hands-on, manipulative math program that works by building math skills upon each other. (Since they are on different levels in math and grammar/dictation, I will be switching off between time slots in the early morning for this and independent reading so they can each get individual attention in these subjects).

Reading - 1 hour daily at least from book lists for subject areas and/or literature. I have a plethora of book lists!

Grammar: Copy-work/Dictation - 30 min - I have First Language Lessons 3 from Peace Hill Press, publishers of The Well-Trained Mind. It involves sentence mapping and such and is meant for Noah's grade level, but I will probably work with Dallas also to be sure he is on track. I took a semester on grammar in college and still have that $50 textbook, so I will use that as well to devise my own curriculum for grammar once they have finished this text. The other 2 days of the week we will do dictation. (No grammar on Nature Walk day).

Composition - 30 min - Writing workshop. I learned this method in college and like it (have lots of textbooks on it - I studied to be a reading teacher), especially the use of graphic organizers which I think will help Dallas tremendously. Even Savanna can join in soon as she is already drawing and writing (my only leftie). But we will also use the thematic approach to writing whenever appropriate. I have a lot of "Mailbox" magazines from the '90s I got from Half-price that are chock full of ideas and printables. I especially love the literature section. I think a teacher sold her entire collection!

Religion - 15-30 min - We will have devotional after breakfast before school begins, taken from the daily readings in One Bread, One Body. I will also be reading aloud to them after lunch from a children's Bible that presents the Bible in a story format. We all made our own lap book for the books of the Bible that we will be keeping notes in as we read. This idea was passed along by a freecycling friend of mine (someone I met through freecycle - I love freecycle; if you feel bad about throwing away perfectly good stuff because you are trying to declutter your house but don't have the time/inclination for a garage sale or trekking stuff down to Goodwill, then check out www.freecycle.org for your area.) who also home schools her 2 boys (Thanks, Melissa!). Lap books are a lot of fun, and I will try to post pictures of them as they are working on them or complete them. Visit http://www.tobinslab.com/ or http://www.handsofachild.com/ to learn more. The idea is to research a topic and keep all your notes in a handy "lapbook" designed and decorated by the child that the student can pull out and study in their lap anywhere in the house or on the go. So awesome!

Here is the Books of the Bible Lapbook we created from the directions we purchased from Tobin's Lab (theirs are much more colorful than mine):

Closed lap books. They are made from file folders:

The leftmost page when open:

This is the middle and the open page extension, The middle page is the end of the Old Testament, and the red page is the beginning of the New Testament starting with the 4 gospels.

This is the other side of that page extension, and there is a book inside the envelope that lists the books which are the Letters to Paul. Then there is a section for the next books, and at the far right is the final book of the Bible, Revelation.

This is a great tool to teach the time line of the Bible as well as helping them to see "the big picture" someday. I am only just getting that "big picture" myself and don't know yet how to express it into words, but I am coming into that understanding, and it is amazing. (I listened to part of Jeff Cavins "The Great Adventure" in RCIA, and it was good - but it was so packed with information I would love to listen to the whole series several times). The Bible is the greatest single work of literature on the planet in my opinion. For it to take years to understand its complexity and intricacies and yet still understand it on another level for its simplicities, it is just awesome. I hope I have an opportunity to teach religious education someday at our church (when I have no kids at home, of course!). It is my favorite subject to study.

These are pics of Noah's lapbook for the same thing, empty of course since we will be adding as we go. Notice instead of the "pizza book" for the prophecy books, Noah chose a pocket and cards. I mostly followed the instructions, but you can make these up any way you want to once you get the basic idea of how to design the lap book and make the mini-books that go inside, where they willl write their notes.

Lap Books are fun! -=)

Narration - a few minutes daily - following any readings we do for that day, in the form of a game, using a narration cube.

Foreign Language - 30 min - I have Learn Spanish With Grace! The Catholic Approach to Learning Spanish which I have heard raves about. I also have Latina Christiana I for teaching Latin. I don't know yet whether I will do a little of both daily or switch off from day to day, but they will study foreign language daily (except for the day we do nature walks).

Music Practice - 30 min - piano or singing. I am not a good piano player, but I know the basics and can teach them the basics which can hopefully turn into something good. I do not know what method I will be using, we will not be starting this right away as I want to be sure they get all their major subjects running smoothly first. I do not know how to teach singing theory at all, but I can teach them songs I know. I can teach them guitar and cello if they are interested...

Chores - daily - Not really a subject per se, but an important part of running this house and school smoothly. I figure if chores are part of the daily school routine, they will be most likely to get done on a daily basis! I am trying to de-clutter my life and my house which will take time since I cannot afford to pay a professional to come out and help me do it. I am learning how to be a better homemaker little by little (I am not very good at it!), so this will definitely be a learning process! A good place to learn the art of cleaning your home is http://www.flylady.net/. I had to stop getting the daily emails because it was too much for me (I am an almost hopeless case), but there are great ideas there. My mom always went to bed with a shiny sink! I found a blog that I really like called House Art Journal. I don't know if I can ever reach that level, but I aspire to...

Twice Weekly:
Religion - 30 min - This time slot will focus on a specific saint to learn about for that day and also lessons on Advent, Lent, or Easter.

Spelling/Dictation - 15-25min - Part of their daily grammar lessons - so while 2 days are spent on grammar instruction, the other 2 are spent on dictation. Rather than having a "spelling list" that they are tested on weekly, I have decided to try "dictation". Basically, they study a paragraph for several minutes, making sure to note every capital letter, punctuation mark, and spelling words. I then take the passage and read it aloud to them, and they copy it onto the paper. They get to use a red pencil to compare it to the original and make corrections. If there are too many corrections, we will revisit that passage the next time. Otherwise, we will file it away in their folder once they have successfully copied it. I can see this as being nearly impossible to do in the public school classroom, but I think it will give me more insight into where they are on a weekly basis, letting me know what areas, including spelling, that we need to work on during grammar instruction.

Poetry - 15-25 min - I will have them write their own poetry based on an idea I give them if they don't already have something they are working on or want to work on.

History - 30 min - I have broken history up into readings from The Story of the World from Peace Hill Press twice weekly and then activities (I have the activity book and tests also) and map work twice weekly for a total of 4 days history study weekly. I got my black line maps from http://www.knowledgequestmaps.com/. We will be starting with Ancient history, but because I am starting with them in late elementary, I will be focusing also on American history some as well.

Art - 30 min - I have Discovering Great Artists: Hands-On Art for Children in the Style of the Great Masters by Maryann F. Kohl (from Amazon). I also have Art Projects from Around the World: Grades 4-6: Step-by-step Directions for 20 Beautiful Art Projects That Support Learning About Geography, Culture, and Other Social Topics by Linda Evans (from Half-Price Books) and Celebrating Diversity With Art: Thematic Projects for Every Month of the Year by Willet Ryder (from college). Between these resources, I am developing art based on what we are studying.

Science - 30-45 min - I have Considering God's Creation which I purchased from http://www.tobinslab.com/ - they have all sorts of cool science stuff for home schoolers. I will use this as a springboard and to keep us on track. I also know what sorts of things they are supposed to learn, etc, but I want for science to be student-led discovery based. We will be making lap books, both premade (from http://www.handsofachild.com/) and made on our own (Ultimate Lapbook Handbook by Cindy Regeling & Tammy Duby and Big Book of Books by Dinah Zike - both purchased from http://www.tobinslab.com/ - are excellent resources for lap booking), and we will also be experimenting. I have many books on science & experiment ideas I collected while I was working at Hasting's.

Once Weekly:
Religion - 30 min - catechism from the Baltimore Catechism No. 2. Many Catholic home schools use Faith & Life, but I like the simplicity of the Baltimore and find it to be a better fit for my family.

Shakespeare Reading - 30 min - a read-aloud. I love Shakespeare and hope my boys will as well! Maybe they will understand it better if I start them young. You can almost always incorporate a Shakespeare work into your curriculum from history, geography, poetry, etc.

Mythology/Tales Reading - 30 min - read-aloud session. They will have a 30 min read-aloud session daily (after lunch, a great time for read-alouds) either from literature or history (The Story of the World).

Poetry Reading - 30 min - read-aloud - From The Harp and the Laurel Wreath: Poetry and Dictation for the Classical Curriculum ed. by Laura M. Berquist. I got mine from Amazon; it is an excellent anthology of poetry - I will love reading it myself! I also plan to read them poems by Shel Silverstein for fun, A Light in the Attic and Where the Sidewalk Ends , purchased from the school book fairs, were my favorite books as a child, and I destroyed them just from reading them so much (which is quite a feat - I have always tried to take care of my books, but if you read something every day, it is bound to wear out)!

Music Appreciation - throughout the week - I have an extensive CD library of classical music I've collected over the years for them to listen to while we are working sometimes. I can do short mini-lessons on the style and time period and even geography to show where on the globe it was composed, and we will do a composer study weekly. (Another great opportunity to do research at the library). I know you can get just about everything you need to do from the internet, but I want for them to experience the library as I did as a child. It was my favorite place in the whole school, and the Round Rock Library is 10 times bigger than our little school library.

Picture Study - We will study one artist per week and look at their works, researching them at the library. I hope to incorporate several visits to different art museums throughout the year also. Austin has one, San Antonio has a couple, and Houston (we have family there) has an awesome art museum.

Library visit - anywhere from 1-3 hours. They will have an opportunity to research something that they wanted to learn more about from our studies (a "research journal"). Also to check out books for reading for pleasure and study. We will also look up the artist we are studying that week, so we can look at his/her works.

Nature Walk - 1-3 hours (depending on the weather!) I also plan on having a picnic lunch on these days whenever possible, and doing the read-aloud for that day outdoors. They will be making a nature journal to document their discoveries and observations in during their nature walk. I love this idea for a: Nature Journal. I also have several nature craft books in my library. We have the Lady Bird Wildflower Center here (wildflowers have been a passion of mine since my first year of college at Texas Woman's University where they actually had a wildflower study course which sadly I did not get to take, but I had a friend who did and I went with her on wildflower searches, so much fun in a relaxing getting in touch with nature sort of way) and a nature center as well as many parks and trails to explore. The possibilities are endless, and this will be one of my favorite times of the week, probably the kids' also. It is proven that gardening lengthens your life and lowers stress levels, and why shouldn't it since God meant for us to work with the land and provide for our families in that way. Think of the people you know who have lots of plants, gardens or intricate backyard retreats and of their temperaments and also of the people you know who are stuck in cold office environments all the time with hardly any connection to nature. New Yorkers have a bad "rep" for being nasty, and hardly anyone has a backyard or garden. You tend to think of farmers as being laid back folk, not quick tempered, but even-keeled, easy going. Things that make you go "hmmmm"...

Family Night - no time limit - This is a great time not only for playing games together but also for teaching the kids some values. I have a book called An Intro to Family Nights which has activities all spelled out which I will use as a guide to help us get started. We have had family nights here and there, but now I'm planning on making sure it is done weekly. Every family should have traditions, and we have many that are for special occasions, but family night will be our biggest tradition which I hope will follow for generations to come. Just about every time we go to visit Dan's parent's house, since we have been dating, his dad will break out a board game or dominoes, and we will play until the wee hours of the morning (Monica usually falling asleep in a chair), and it is a lot of fun. Since the family is all together, it is the perfect time for teaching some sort of values which will follow them throughout their lives along with family night.

Whew!

This is just a breakdown of the subjects. It is also what I plan on doing, in a perfect world, which of course does not exist. I always plan big and make sure I have too much rather than too little. It's the perfectionist in me. But I don't feel bad if I don't use something, and it is much better for a teacher to be over-prepared than under-prepared. I am the same way with den meetings. You can lose control very easily with "dead air!" I have a daily schedule with times all mapped out which I'm sure will get tweaked also. Maybe I will have time to blog how the first week of school went.

Popcorn Show & Sell for the Cub Scouts starts this weekend also, so we will have a very eventful week! Dallas, Noah, & Dan are logging 14 hours next week for popcorn sales (we are trying to get it all out of the way early before it gets unbearably hot). Last year we spread it out over the month, and the last couple of weeks they were extremely wiped out. But they still sold a little over $800 together! We'll see which way is better after this little experiment.

=-) Baby Bailey vs. Baby Orangutan =-)

2007-07-11T23:04:00.000-07:00

I took these photos of Bailey (he's 1.5 now!) because his hair was especially unruly one day (Savanna poured milk on him), and he looked just like a baby orangutan to me. Hey, if you run out of mousse or hair gel, maybe milk'll do the trick!

Save the Orangutans! They're part of our family - literally!

Kingdom: Animalia
Phylum: Chordata
Subphylum: Vertebrata
Class: Mammalia
Order: Primates
Suborder: Haplorrhini
Family: Hominidae (chimps, gorillas, humans, and orangutans)

Only gorillas and chimpanzees are more closely related to humans, and all possess cognitive abilities comparable to us...

What if they were tearing down our homes or killing us to take our baby as a pet? Would we stand for it? Of course, they would never do such a thing...

http://www.pbs.org/wnet/nature/orangutans/saving.html

Savanna is now 3 and 1/4. Here is a recent photo of her, all glammed up after I curled her hair with my steam rollers - it's fun to have a girl!

Here is a recent photo of Dallas & Noah from cub scout day camp, all glammed up after spending a day in the sweltering Texas heat - boys are fun, too!

And a cute recent picture of Bailey - on a better hair day:

Such a cute smile!
Check out that single tiny dimple on the left (your left).
He's going to have the ladies swimming in those eyes of his!
(Case in point: I bet you didn't even notice that HUGE booger hanging in his nose - his eyes are that hypnotic! =-)

Faith and Reason

2007-04-04T14:44:00.000-07:00

I thought it was interesting that Dan sent me this article today: click here to read it.
~~
It is about a doctor who works on the human genome project and how he believes in God despite his strong scientific background. I thought this was fortuitous at first, but was it, really? Do things happen only by chance? I don't think so, but I do think we don't always see the big picture.
~~
Last week at RCIA, the subject was "Faith and Reason" which was the title of a letter written by Pope John Paul II. You can see the letter in it's entirety here: Fides et Ratio. I think this is a very important topic for the times. It helps me especially as I am teaching my children about God and creation and shaping their faith and beliefs. Dallas is very interested in science, and I feel his vocation may be science related. It is very fitting that it should be coming up so much for me as I am coming so close to my own beginning of sorts.
I have chosen my saint name for this Saturday, St. Monica. She is a patron saint for mothers and for patience, and her story spoke to me. She prayed for 17 years for her son's conversion as he was leading a life of debauchery, and he was sainted also! I aspire to have even a fraction of her patience.

Awaiting Baptism

2007-04-03T09:22:00.000-07:00

I am getting baptized Saturday! I am very excited about this and have yearned for it since I was a little girl. I have been attending mass every Sunday (except for illness in the family) and RCIA on Monday evenings since October. Dan and I took the 7 week Marriage Course earlier this year, and we also attended the Trinitarian Faith Experience together. I would recommend both to anyone who wants to revitalize their marriage or Catholic faith (the Marriage Course is non-denominational Christian, although you do not have to be Christian to benefit from it, and offered through many churches worldwide; the couple on the DVD are British). It was really cool because our course was arranged so you got to have a candlelight dinner together at this wonderful local family owned Italian restaurant (Gino's in Round Rock), and then you watch the DVD course. The couple teaching it are engaging orators; you can tell they have an ideal marriage, and the course is laid out well. Throughout, you have some work you do with your partner discussing whatever the topic is, and then of course you have a little homework to complete. The most important thing we took away from the course is that we need to have 2 hours of "marriage time" every week that must be scheduled and protected as it is very important to keep your bond strong - so true when you have 4 kids! But there is so much more good stuff. If you are married, you really should find a course near you, even if you think your marriage is perfect! Nobody's perfect, so there's no way 2 people trying to cohabitate together are perfect! We'll probably take it again in a year or so because I am sure we will need some more reinforcement. Plus, the forced dates are nice! Next Monday, April 9th, we will have our marriage blessed which will be another exciting event.

This has been a tremendous growth period for all of us individually and as a couple and family. The next order of business will be to get each of our children baptized and continue forth in raising our children in the Catholic faith. I thank God for leading me in this direction and for all of the souls who have helped Him along the way. I feel truly blessed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Here is the shawl I am working on to wear at our marriage blessing. I hope I can finish it! It is the Flower Basket Shawl by Evelyn A. Clark from Interweave Knits Fall 2004 issue. I wanted to make a shawl to wear at my wedding blessing, so that I would have something special to give to Savanna some day (maybe when she gets married!

Flower Basket Shawl
yarn: Treliske Organic Merino 3 ply in cream (given to me by my wonderful friend Jenny of Tiny Birds Organics) pattern calls for lace weight doubled, but I am using a single strand baby weight
needles: Addi Turbo circulars 4mm (US 6) 24"
photo of finished shawl (after blocking): click here
Sidenote to fellow knitters: This pattern can be very difficult to find- I had a hard time and spent months tracking it down (almost impossible to find a copy of the magazine, even on eBay, as this copy is out of print and highly prized. There were a lot of good patterns inside besides this one. So if you really want to make one of these, email me, and I might be able to help you find it.

Day 1 (3/4/06):

Close up of the lace pattern:

Today (on the 11th repeat so far, pattern calls for 7, but I want a bigger shawl). I have a marker on the center stitch. The bottom in the picture is actually the top of the shawl.

I have a ways to go, so I better hop to it! I don't know if you can tell, but a few rows are a bit felted because I was working on it one night when I was too tired, and I had to keep going back to fix it (there is a lot of counting involved in lace, you work with a graph, sort of like needlepoint). If you know me, you know I have a problem with sweaty hands, and this is not good when you are working with wool fibers and have to keep going back to re-knit a row several times! If you can't tell, then I am glad and don't feel so bad about it. I will post a finished picture when I am done which hopefully will be this weekend!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In other knitting news, I finally finished these soaker shorts for Savanna (I started it last year - ever since Bubby has started walking, I just can't knit as much as I would like to). I had a doctor appt. a couple of weeks ago, this was in my diaper bag for times like this when the doctor was an hour behind schedule!

It's a circular pattern (I used size 5 addi turbos 16") knitted all in one piece (no grafting) based on a soaker that my friend Jenny of Tiny Birds Organics designed. I used the no grafting technique for a seamless soaker I learned from the "WHW Trim Soaker Pattern" at Warm Heart Woolies. I used the sports weight version of the same yarn from Treliske that I am using for my shawl. It is the softest wool yarn I have ever worked with, the best in my opinion, for babies. I dyed it in the microwave with soarin' strawberry and berry blue kool-aids. The tie-string looks like I-cord, but is actually crocheted by making a chain and then doing a half single crochet (I think that's what it's called) in each stitch (you just stick the hook in the back of each chain and then pull the yarn through without doing any yarn-overs). For the finishing touch that makes it look feminine, I crocheted shell stitch in the leg openings. Savanna is pretty much potty trained, so this isn't an actual functioning soaker for her, but just some pretty shorts to wear!

Texas Bluebonnets & Travels with Flat Stanley

2007-04-01T17:31:00.000-07:00

Today was a beautiful day to be out and about in central Texas. Here is Dallas, Noah, Savanna, and Bailey in the Bluebonnets after the Palm Sunday service at church. It has been an annual tradition of mine to take snapshots every Spring in the Bluebonnets. I developed a love for wildflowers in the Spring of 1993 when I had to spend many 3-day weekends alone my freshman year at Texas Woman's University in Denton. I bought a book, so I could go out on the university grounds and identify the many wildflowers growing about the campus. It was so much better than being cooped up in the dorm all by myself (I did not have a car). I took pictures of myself for the first time in Spring 1994 with my roommate, Kelly, my sophomore year at Sam Houston State University in Huntsville off of Hwy 19 near Bearkat Blvd. I have pictures of Dan and I (his sister, Monica, was with us taking pictures) in another patch of Bluebonnets down that same highway in 1995 after we had been dating for a year. I try to find a new spot every year. I have only missed a few years in between either because of the weather being bad for blooming or life being too hectic to get out. This is a great year for Bluebonnets! They are blooming beautifully right now. This is a field off Dell Way close to the intersection of Mays:

This is Flat Stanley. He traveled with us everywhere today. Before coming to live with us, he traveled around the United States with a college student from Auburn University named Taylor. It is a project Noah is doing for his 2nd grade class. Taylor made a scrap book of her travels across the United States with Flat Stanley, and Noah has to do the same. He was in several feet of snow in Park City Utah in December, and he was in cactus and Bluebonnets with us in the 80 degree Texas heat! So far he has been to Alabama, South Carolina, Utah, Idaho, and Texas.

Off 2222 in Austin is Mt. Bonnell. Here is the stairway we had to walk up to get to the apex. I carried Bailey on my back in a carrier, Dan carried Savanna part of the way, and Dallas and Noah took turns carrying my diaper bag - they could barely stand it! But the views from the top were worth the exertion!

Savanna and Noah with Flat Stanley at the Mt. Bonnell dedication rock.

Mt. Bonnell overlooks the Colorado River which feeds Lake Austin, Town Lake, and Lake Travis.

Flat Stanley in Austin Cacti off Mt. Bonnell Rd.:

Flat Stanley driving up to the capitol down Congress Ave.:

The state capitol building of Texas:

Dallas, Noah, and Savanna at the front doors of the capitol.

Looking up into the dome from the center of the building. It says "TEXAS" around the star at the top.

Flat Stanley "shaking hands" with president George W. Bush.

I am on level E2, which is an extension of the capitol building, taking this picture of Dan and the kids who are on level E1 which is the lowermost level of the building. Dallas and Noah are laying on a picture of the Alamo.

Here I am taking a rest on one of the benches in the center of the building just before we left. We had been taking some pictures of Bailey, so he is squinting his eyes in anticipation of the flash. Isn't he so cute?

Savanna digging in the dirt:

Dallas, Noah, and Flat Stanley in front of one of the statues on the capitol grounds:

We made this quick stop on the way back home from the capitol just for Flat Stanley. Here he is "standing" on the Round Rock in Brushy Creek right off Chisholm Trail Rd. (that's I35 in the background). The city of Round Rock got its name from this rock which was a landmark for the wagons that traveled on the Chisholm Trail. This signaled to them whether the water was low enough for the wagons to travel across the creek. If the Round Rock was under water, it was a no go! There are ruts in the rock creek bed from the wagons that are over 100 years old.

After we left the Round Rock, we headed over to the the Hawaiian shaved ice stand on Mays St. for some cooling refreshments, and then we went home. Savanna was glad to be back home and reunited with her "meenie." Whew! What a day...

Oh, No! Boom!

2007-01-07T11:37:00.000-08:00

Oh, No, Boom!

This is a very funny video of Savanna (3 min) from a very stormy day in January. Savanna is a little afraid of thunder; the older she gets the better she understands what it is and the lesser her fear, but it is entertaining to watch and listen to small children as they grapple with things like thunder. Savanna tells you she does not like something by saying, for example, "Don't want it, boom." She talks about a "go-go" also which is one of the characters from the movie "Cars" that she is holding. The lights go out while I am taping, and her reaction is priceless. Something else surprising happens if you watch the video.
~~
These are cute, too, from the same day: 2 are of the hail storm and Noah, Savanna, and Dallas with their hands out of the window trying to feel the rain and hail (about 3.5min total), and another of Dallas and Savanna outside on the front porch (about 2 min) so she can see the booms are not so scary after all...

Thunder on the Porch

Ice

Little Hands, Rain, & Hail

TTFN - Carrie

Happy New Year!

2007-01-01T11:55:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year!

We are ringing in the new year with the Mays family tradition of toasting each other with a glass of sparkling grape juice (never liked champagne) after the ball drops on Dick Clark's Rockin' New Year's Eve. This was Savanna's first year, and she absolutely loved it. She had 2 glasses!

Many well wishes to everyone for 2007 from the Mays family!

Bears Earn their Rank

2006-12-15T02:26:00.000-08:00

I am very excited and proud of this achievement. Most packs wait until the Blue & Gold Banquet to earn rank, but a lot of boys in our pack also take part in sports in the spring. So I tried to schedule the curriculum with us finishing rank by the Holiday Party in December. It worked out pretty well since all but one scout earned rank (the other is VERY close). The theme for the meeting was "stars", so I cut out a star and put each scout's name on it along with a quote or saying that matched the theme glued on the front. On the back, I taped a piece of paper in the shape of a pocket to hide away the rank patch in. The idea was to have parents and scouts together and give the star to the parents, saying that the parents, rather than the children, were the stars, and that our children were our moons because they reflect back everything that we shine upon them. I am sure I am not the best orator, so I hope they understood what I was trying to say in such a short time. We only had a short time as the main focus of the night is on the crossover ceremony from the Webelos 2, which was an awesome event. My friend Jennifer's son became a boy scout tonight!

Here are some Bears and parents very proud of their achievement!

Here is my den, from left, Will, Zachary, Kurt, Konrad (in front), Dallas, and Bryan. (not pictured: Jonathan, Marshall, & Hayden - they were all there but left before I could get this picture).

And here is Dallas holding his star:

Since I was busy facilitating the awards ceremony and Dan was busy with Savanna & Bailey, despite having a camera with us, I did not take any pictures. These were generously passed along to me, and I think there are some that have Dallas in the frame and hopefully of Noah's ceremony also. I sometimes feel like a horrible mom not capturing these precious moments on film, but I get to experience a lot more being the den leader and in the thick of things. It is not really natural to have the camera and make them all pose in the middle of the ceremony. I am thankful to all of those who can sit in the audience and take pictures and share them with us. God Bless you!

Here is a picture from the back of the Webelos 2 crossover ceremony; they actually "cross over" a bridge:

I will add more soon if I get them! I hope to get pictures from other parents that will hopefully have my kids in them.

Bailey Turns One

2006-12-10T08:39:00.000-08:00

Bailey's birthday is December 10th. We had a party for him Saturday. He is officially a toddler now that he is walking. It has been a tradition since Dallas for us to get a cake especially for the baby turing one (and another cake for the rest of the family) since it is a milestone for them: their first honest to goodness sugar attack! I never let them have candy or cake other than maybe some small tastes, so this is truly the first time they are allowed to go crazy and have as much sugar as they want. You can see the progression from cute calm baby to full fledged sugar rush and finally to the quiet calm from having a belly full of cake.

Bailey opening presents with Mama, Savanna helping:

Say cheese!

Happy Birthday to you! He's shaking a glowstick:

Hmmm. What is this stuff?

Still testing the waters. But it's looking really good!

Oh, yeah, this is great! Sugar rush! My sister-in-law Monica is enjoying the show, and her son, our nephew Alex, is sticking his tongue out at Bailey. Bailey is a very good copycat!

One of Dan's family traditions. Cake somebody! Noah was a good sport about it.

Bailey is caking himself!

Okay. I'm getting full now, but i can't bring myself to stop putting my hands into the cake. It beckons me!

So now I will feed mama! I must keep attacking the cake!

Alex gets caked:

Hee hee hee. This is vintage Bailey. He makes the funniest little faces as he loves to entertain. I think, however, here it is a reaction to so much sugar in his blood!

Cake anyone? I've had plenty, but there's lots more here to go around.

Sister Savanna has had her fill:

And me, too. Just sucking my fingers now. Stop me, somebody, please!

If you have time to watch a few cute videos, here are some from the party. Savanna Helps Herself to Cake, so funny because she decides to take matters in her own hands while I am ignoring her to watch and tape the Bubby show. In Savanna Cleans Up we see her need for clean, she is an obsessive clean freak for someone who can make a pretty good mess herself! And finally, Bathing Bubby is the perfect end to a perfect day as we clean away all the sugar and macaroni. Bailey can sure party hardy! He slept very well that evening...
~~
Happy Birthday, Bailey!!!

Breakfast With Santa

2006-12-09T05:16:00.000-08:00

Dan took the kids to Breakfast with Santa at the school so they could get pictures with Santa. It was not all that spectacular, just muffins, juice, and waiting in line, but as you can see from the pictures, they managed to find a way to have some fun roaming around the empty school. Here is some cute shots of Savanna and Noah outside the school before they went in:

Savanna dragging her bubba around - she's the boss, you know...

Look at us! We're so strong!

Savanna running to PaPa (Dan's dad):

Hugging PaPa:

Hugging Noah:

Hugging Dallas:

Dragging Dallas around - Savanna's the boss, you Know!

Reading in the Library:

Waiting in line for Santa:

Getting their picture taken with Santa (Savanna doesn't look too thrilled! You have to click on the picture to see the larger version to see her face):

"Nani Go Round-Round"

2006-12-02T04:55:00.000-08:00

Here's Bubby in his walker. Dan was trying to show me how Savanna liked it when he spinned her around and around really fast (to get her dizzy - it's somehow entertaining to get kids and cats dizzy and watch them try to walk like little drunkards), or as she says "Nani go round-round," but she wouldn't do it. So as always if you want a kid to do something, do it with the sibling, and they will inevitably get jealous and do what you want. Oh, how deviously we can manipulate our children! (Hey, it sometimes works on adults - I mean, how many movies have you seen where the girl tries to get the attention of a guy by going out with someone else!)

And here's Savanna getting jealous as planned:

Nani go round-round!

I love the way you can see the effects of velocity on her hair!

Bubby Walks

2006-12-01T21:35:00.000-08:00

Here is a new video titled Bubby Walks. He has been trying to walk for a couple of weeks now, but after 1-2 steps would hit the ground crawling. I don't think he felt safe walking. But he is getting more and more brave every day, and I took this video earlier today. It is the most steps he has taken so far. He might have started walking sooner if I did not have to keep him in his play yard so much. It is not an easy task keeping up with 4 kids, and that is the safest place for him! I cannot keep him in the walker anymore because he has started to bring his feet up and try to rocket himself out. So I would literally have to keep my eyes on him every moment, which ideally you are supposed to do while they are in those things, but with Savanna around, this is impossible (she is high maintenance... still). So I can't put him in there! I lost my camera for a month which is my way of saying I have been super sick for a month, one thing after another. It is sad to lose a whole month of my life; I was only able to do the bare minimum for my family. Dan was sick for a couple of weeks himself, neither of us could just lay up in bed like we wanted to. I am thankful for my renewed health and hope it will stay this way for a while!

Bailey hasn't changed much in the face - same 'ole yummy cutie pie. He'll be one Sunday (Dec 10th). All my babies except Noah waited until they were exactly one to start walking (Noah was walking at nine months, and he did not hesitate for a moment. Once he figured out he could walk, he was running and chasing after Dallas). Hope you enjoyed the video - I know it got a little crazy towards the end. I had Bailey in the room by myself, but then the whole gand arrived and chaos ensued. Bubby might have walked longer if it wasn't a madhouse in there! That could be another reason he has waited so long to walk - he does a lot of people watching around here. It's better than TV to him!

Trick or Treat?

2006-10-31T18:48:00.000-08:00

PS: These last few entries were my first attempt to use the Picasa to download multiple pictures to the blog, and it was a HUGE time saver but for some reason several pictures are not showing up, so I will go back the to slow old fashioned way. It just takes longer to post so fewer posts - I may never catch up -= like how I feel with scrapbooking! =-)

Savanna is wearing the same costume from last year (it still fit!). Noah wanted to be a pirate, and I waited too late to buy anything, so I made this the night before. I made the scarf, vest, and sash from some $1/yd fabric on clearance, and I managed to find a hat for him. He's wearing one of Dan's dress shirts with the sleeves stuffed up so it looks like a pirate shirt. Dallas looks just like my dad, and when I was a little girl I used to think my dad was Superman because when he would wake up in the morning, he always had that little curl like Christopher Reeve had as Superman, but after he would shower and get ready, it was gone! I can't remember what age I was when I realized Superman wasn't real. So I found this Superman Returns costume and thought it was perfect for Dallas.

Just before the journey:

Totally off subject, but not so much. Just for fun, here are some comparison photos (I finally got a scanner, so I am adding these photos a year later, a digression I probably would have made back then)...

Dad, Michael Ray Fowler, probably about 9 months? There's his Superman curl...

Dallas at 9 months:

Dad, maybe 10 or 11 months:

Dallas, at 11 months, his first Halloween:

Dallas at 11 months:

Dallas, One year old:

Dad, one year old:

Dallas, again, one year old (he's quite a bit chubbier than Dad, but he's a skinny dude now!):

More fun - Can you pick Mike? He's in the same grade that Dallas is in these photos (I didn't put those numbers on there):

And here's Dad, looks like junior high maybe - so maybe Dallas will look like this in a few years (like me, huh?):

BTW - he's #2 in that group photo...

And here's my dad in his late teens or early 20's, in the Navy (Vietnam War) - on the back of the photo it says "Well, here I am in my dress whites!

And on the back of this one, it says, "The real me!"

Here he is on the ship, probably close to the end of his tour. He never wore a 'stache with us. Probably like me, Mom didn't care for the whisker kisses! Dad met Mom right after he left the service.

This is me, about Dallas's age - weird, huh? Who looks like who?

This is Dad how I remember him...

Always barbecuing on the weekends. No one has matched his technique (not even Smokey 'Mo - and we LOVE Smokey 'Mo's)

Santa Daddy, Christmas 1995, always passing the presents to us:

At Dallas's 1st birthday party. He passed on to Heaven less than a year later (2 days before my birthday).

And here I am, forever his daughter, as I used to write on all his birthday and Father's Day cards. He's almost giving away his secret identity here. Doesn't every little girl think her dad's Superman?

Back to Halloween...

Haunted house (Noah trying to look cool):

Scared?

Trick or Treat!

Savanna following her bubbas:

Noah escorting Savanna to their next destination:

On the couch after gathering the loot:

Arrr matey!

It's a plane; it's a train; no wait!

It's Superman!

I think there is candy in her mouth:

and on her fingers:

Cute shot of the ladybug wings:

Bubby faces:

Boogie letting Bailey pet him:

Savanna and Mama:

Savanna and Daddy (it's bedtime!):

Natural Bridge Wildlife Ranch

2006-10-21T16:58:00.000-07:00

The original plan was for Dan to take the boys to Six Flags, this was the last weekend they would be open, but Dallas was not feeling well (he was making deposits to the porcelain bank, if you know what I mean). They were pretty upset, so we tried to think of something we could do that Dallas could enjoy. We brought along a bucket just in case (thank goodness!), and made the drive down to San Antonio. It was awesome! We will have to do it again someday so Dallas can get the full experience. If you want to check it out click here. If you do a google search for "natural bridge wildlife coupon" you are sure to find a coupon for at least $1 off all the tickets, and you can spend those savings on extra food ($1 a bag), so everyone can have a bag. We all had a bag, even Savanna, and we still ran out of food! You feel really bad for the rams at the end because you know they don't get as much because people run out. And Monica told us to be sure to save some for them, which we did, but there are a lot of rams at the very end. Enjoy the pics!

You have to close your window when the ostriches walk up unless you want to get pecked! A couple of cars in front of us was a convertible - I wonder what they did!

An emu, I think.

Rhinos - I wonder why they don't let them roam? =)

My favorite:

Just like some people have more pushy personalities, it is so also with zebras!

Open wide!

Aww... Mama nursing:

She's driving before Dallas and Noah! Savanna at the wheel:

The rams are quite pushy also. We got trapped once and had to lure them away from the front of the car with some food. I wonder if this is a con!

Baby rams:

Giraffe - I love the effect of the sun behind him.

Wallaby, I think. I've heard of them but never seen one - I thought they would be bigger like kangaroos. They look like mini kangaroos:

Another family took this for us and we returned the favor for them. If you notice Dallas is missing. He is in the car because at the end of the tour, he was feeling worse, poor baby. We'll have to go back in the spring maybe. And, yes, Savanna's shirt is too big. She is wearing one of the boys' old shirts - it has Spongebob on it!

Raingutter Regatta

2006-10-19T17:41:00.000-07:00

For the October Cub Scout Pack Meeting, we had our annual Raingutter Regatta. This was a first for us because we missed this meeting last year. They give the boys a boat kit, they have to put it together, and they get to race it in the rain gutters filled with water! Before the race, they received their awards, and these pictures were not so great before I fixed them with the push of one button (auto contrast) with Picasa. Picasa is great! I use it to upload my pictures to the blog also - it is much faster than pulling them up individually from My Pictures. What will Google think of next?

Bear den holding their awards (L to R: Kurt, Roman, Will, Hayden, Konrad, me, Dallas; not pictured are Zachary, Marshall, Jonathan, and Bryan):

Part of Wolf den, Noah holding his awards:

Noah racing:

Close up of his boat - he likes skulls:

Dallas cheating with his boat (not supposed to use your hands, you can only blow air into the sail) - his favorite color is still green

Dallas vs. Noah:

Dan is trying to help Dallas not to cheat! He is so excited and wants to win badly!

Looks like Dallas is in the lead:

Bailey on Noah's shoulders before we leave:

My Friend Anna

2006-10-13T17:30:00.000-07:00

Anna and I go way back all the way to 6th grade when we first met in math class. Anna invited me to my first Bible study which was the start of the most important relationship of my life. This is the first time we have seen each other since my wedding! She was in town for a teacher's conference, and we spent several hours catching up and sharing our scrapbooks. Here we are at T.G.I.Friday's in the Arboretum. I still love Anna Beth, and I always will! Bubby fell in love with her too!

Afternoon Car Ride

2006-10-13T14:30:00.000-07:00

Savanna's out cold. The car is the only place she will sleep other than her bed, sometimes.

Can you tell I take my camera with me everywhere?
I took these while Dan was driving. I have learned how to position the camera with outreached arms (to snap Bailey) without even having to look through the lens! A mother's art when she has kiddoes who sometimes don't like when you hide behind the camera! They always smile better when they can see you smiling at them. But it seems as if this time he was actually smiling for the camera! It was so cute, I took several pictures just so I could look at him as I could not see him since he is rear facing.

Texas Fans - big and small

2006-10-08T10:54:00.000-07:00

And they won the day before! The Bub is good luck...

My Little Cubs

2006-10-03T22:17:00.000-07:00

These are the most recent photos I have of the kids. I took these at Grace Church where we had our Cub Scout Bear Den meeting on 10/4. This is one of Savanna holding Dad's hand. She loves her Daddy:

Savanna running (this is why it is hard to get pictures of her!):

This is Dallas in his Bear hat:

Our den chief started climbing trees right when he got there, and several boys followed suit. Noah, always the one to "strike a pose," positioned himself in the tree and said, "Mama, come take a picture of me!" At least one of them loves to get their picture taken! A scrapper's dream:

All of my walking kids exploring the grounds (Savanna loves to copy her Bubbas):

At the meeting, we were doing the achievement on building muscles, so we did a lot of exercises and relays. Savanna copied everything the boys were doing. It was hilarious! Sadly, not all of the pictures I took turned out so hot, but I will cherish the memory. She did the sit-ups, and there was this one exercise where they had a partner and pushed on each other's feet, and Savanna had to do that, so she did it with Daddy (who was teaching this meeting for me). This is really a picture I took of Bryan showing off his muscles, but take a look in the background; Savanna is doing push-ups like her Bubbas (butt way up in the air like Dallas in the blue shirt):

And here she is doing the crab relay next to Noah. She did a really good job at this one:

I found Noah's Tiger neckerchief from last year the next day, and put it on Bailey as a do-rag. He's so precious:

Bubby out...

More Bubby Faces and Noah's "SpyBus" video

2006-09-04T15:26:00.000-07:00

... Noah and Bailey posing together (after we cleaned the food off his face). I posted a video today I just made of Noah showing off his SpyBus - he and Dallas have been making amazing Lego creations since they were 2. Click here (about 2 min): "The Perfect SpyBus". And here we were feeding Bailey some ice cold fruit from the fridge yesterday along with some warm vegetable chicken dinner:

I guess the sensation of going from warm to cold was a weird new experience. I get such a kick out of the faces he makes! Dan says I am easily amused. I guess you could say that - but there is nothing more amusing to me than kids! (probably why I have 4 of them!) How can you not smile and laugh when you see this:

That's my Bubby!!!

Bubby Faces - What big hazel eyes you have!

2006-09-02T16:05:00.000-07:00

The better to see you with, Mama!

School Starts - Mama Stops

2006-08-26T19:54:00.000-07:00

I am extremely behind on posting - I have some great pictures and stories to tell, but it has been quite an adjustment since school started. So I will catch up when I can. The kids were sick with a really gross stomach/intestinal virus the first week of school, and we have been very busy selling popcorn for the boys scouts since Aug 12th.
Last Wednesday, we hosted a pool party for Dallas's cub scout bear den which I am leading this year. It was a huge success! The boys earned their swimming belt loop, and I am so sad that I forgot to take pictures :-( I had the camera there but was so busy with doing this or that with one baby or the other on my hip and keeping an eye on the boys in the pool that it just plain slipped my mind. It was a joy to see all those boys having fun, and I am so glad that I took on this new role no matter how much hard work it is! I hope everyone had a wonderful summer (even though we have not seen the hottest temperatures yet in this neck of the woods, or hills, rather)! Pictures below are from today, just before we went to one of Noah's fellow Wolf scout's birthday party.
TTFN - Carrie

Public Service Announcement - this is what might happen when you have 4 kids:

There is a lotta love, and there are also a lotta messes!!!

Nani Dances Hallelujah!

2006-08-16T19:49:00.000-07:00

Savanna is dancing to the end credits of the movie "Because of Winn Dixie." It was so cute, I had to run upstairs and get my camera and then rewind it (thanks to DVR), so she would do it again. She is not getting down quite as much as she did the first time, but it is still pretty darn cute in the video: "Nani Dances Hallelujah!" I think she must be feeling the Spirit because at one point she closes her eyes and look to the heavens as she dances. We should all get up and dance like the babes - so innocent and free...

Addendum: Ha Ha! I just viewed the video myself for about the 5th time, and I noticed something new. I was wondering why she kept falling "down" a few times in the middle. She was listening to the lyrics, apparently, and playing like she does for "Ring Around the Rosies" when it goes "we all fall down." This song was saying "lay my burdens down." Savanna cracks me up sometimes! :-) Silly Nani!! ;-)

Scout Night at Dell Diamond - August 1, 2006

2006-08-10T01:20:00.000-07:00

We took the kids to a ball game, the first time I ever sat this close to a field. Since I am from Houston, home of the Astros, I only ever sat in the nosebleed seats in the Astrodome! (Hey, I am totally off topic, but Dan's dad did the plumbing for the Reliant Stadium, where the Astros play now and also where Dan and I saw Bon Jovi in February with Monica, Albert and our friends Chris and Erin.) Back on topic: The Round Rock Express is the minor league team for the Astros, so it is pretty cool to see these players since the Astros have been doing pretty well lately. In fact, often times they will put on a huge fire works show that rivals the 4th of July show after the Express win an important game. We can see these fireworks from our back porch or from an upstairs room. Pretty cool, huh? Our dog, Chelsea, is not too keen on it though; she hides behind the couch when they are shooting the fireworks. There were no fireworks at this game, but it was still a fun family night. Here are some photos from the game:

Savanna was "Keeper of the Cup." No one could have a drink unless they knew the secret code word AND she was in a gracious mood.

Dan, Bub, and Dallas:

Noah, Bailey (fingers always in mouth), and me:

This is when Cody Ransom hit a home run for a grand slam - that was cool to see!

Dallas cheering at the end when the Express won the game:

What was cool about tonight's game was that afterwards, the scouts got to stay and do some fun things like swimming and rock climbing, and they brought in pizza and played a movie on the scoreboard, "8 Below". The kids thought it was the greatest thing and want to go do it again whenever they can although Dan, having to work the next day, found it extremely difficult to sleep, what with all the trains going by and with some kids up until after 2am in the morning running around the field. here is a pic of the field covered with sleeping bags:

I think Dan might have to do this again next year - poor Dan!! TTFN - Carrie
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Bailey Sits Up - No, Stands up!!

2006-08-09T23:05:00.000-07:00

I have been meaning to post these images for a while from late July, the 25th to be exact. Bailey started sitting up that day (without falling over!!!) Now, he had already been scoot-crawling before then, so he was able to get just about anywhere he wanted to be. This was perplexing as we get his pictures taken by a phenomenal photographer who takes pictures in stages, the 6-7 month stage being the sitting up stage. Well, since he started "crawling" before sitting, we had to postpone his appointment. If you have seen the results she gets from Savanna, then you would understand why you wait for the "6 month" pictures for the baby to be sitting up. We went in yesterday, the 9th, for his 6th month pictures, even though he is technically 8 months today because of the sitting up milestone. Well, Bailey just wanted to crawl all over the place so it was extremely difficult to keep him still. But Lesley is an artist (pronounced with a bit of a french twist), so I am sure she will get plenty of beautiful photos that I will be sad I cannot afford to buy. But I bought the baby plan already where I get to have 1 photo each from each milestone (3, 6, 9, 12 mths) - that is soooo worth what I paid for it. I have the same layout for Savanna, and it is priceless. When Dallas and Noah were babies, I was all up in Sears, JCPenney, and Wal-Mart, getting pictures of them above and beyond the 3 month markers, but being the mom of 4 kids now, I just do not have the time (or patience) to go get individual photos taken - and forget about family pictures - I think the last one we did was December 2003 when I was pregnant with Savanna! It is sad, but I have not gotten pictures of Savanna since her 1 year pictures, and she is past 2 already. I meant to, really, but I do not feel too guilty since I have this digital camera and take so many more pictures than I ever took of Dallas and Noah when they were babies. We have lots of pictures of her growing up. So I am hoping it will all even out, and they won't feel like I doted on one any more than the other.

Look, what is this thing? A football?

Hey, I knew it was a football, you silly! I was just testing you! Hook 'Em Horns!!!

Anyway, so the Bub started sitting up a couple of weeks ago, and lo and behold, he is standing up already! Yes, he stood up for the first time yesterday which I documented in this video, The Bub Stands Up. Bubby is 8 months today, so this is an omen, I am afraid. Noah started walking by 9 months from sheer will and determination to follow his brother Dallas on his adventures. Bailey has 3 siblings he is modeling after!! They grow way too fast - why can't my last one just stay a baby???
TTFN - Carrie

Ten Years Today - A Love Story

2006-07-27T15:46:00.000-07:00

27 July 1996

This day in the Summer of 1996, Dan and I exchanged vows in a beautiful garden ceremony surrounded by our loved ones. It was the first of the days I call "The best days of my life" because it was overflowing with raw emotion. Several other days on that list, four to be exact, involved the birth of my precious children, for which this day, ten years ago, was the beginning of that story. But let's go back even further...

Our story began on a dark midnight in Spring of 1994; a diverse group of college dorm students ventured out into a grassy expanse occupied by a children's athletic arena. (It was actually just a playground, but that does not sound as romantic!) Our adventure was called "Midnight in the Park," a dorm social event meant to get students out of their rooms and mixing with other crazy people having nothing better to do! My excuse was I did not own a car and suffered from cabin fever! Dan's was that he roomed with the hall council member who sponsored the event. Yes, Dan was on the hall council. We were both nerds in our own way, but we were social nerds!! (We both eventually became RAs, the ultimate social nerd, but I digress, as usual.)

As I stared into the thousands of dewy grass leaves, flashlight fixed against my forehead, he observed my peculiar behavior from afar. "Why does this girl have a flashlight on her forehead?" he thought. He was intrigued and compelled to learn more about her. He had seen her before, around the dorm, and thought she was cute. He remembered her from his door to door travels as the girl who brought oodles of pennies back from her visit home, just like she said she would, for the dorm's penny drive. (Truth be told, I might have been flirting a bit with him when it came to those silly pennies. Do you think I was trying to buy his love?) Flanked by his pals, Dan crossed the space between his group and hers, leaving the comfort of his swing set and pursuing the object of his favor.

Embarrassed, my friend and I explained that we were in search of spiders. She mentioned learning in girl scouts that if you place a flashlight against your forehead, like a third eye, and peer into the grass that spiders' eyes glow red. I still am not certain of the validity of this claim, but it did snag me a husband - so who cares!?! From then on, Dan pursued me in a slow and calculated manner; he must have paid attention in preschool for he took note of the moral of the fable "The Tortoise and the Hare": slow and steady wins the race! After a few days of reconnaissance, gathering all the information he could about me from his friends and acquaintances (you know, Does she have a boyfriend? Is she a whack job? - those sorts of important facts fundamental when considering a potential soul mate), we began the grueling, albeit enjoyable, week long interview process during which we spent our nights staying up until the crack of dawn, barely making it to classes, because we could not stop finding things to talk about. We shared stories and musings, we laughed, we cried, and began falling in love. Oh, and he finally asked me out on our first official date!

I was already hooked, and I think he was also. So I cannot imagine why he was so nervous when he asked me out that first time. He had to know I would say yes. I will never forget the way his eyebrows were trembling as he asked me for a date. He took me to the Jolly Fox, a local tavern in Huntsville where they have pool, beer and country western dancing, but before that, he had to teach me to dance. I fell in love with Dan that day, in those moments when he whisked me around his dorm room floor to the tunes of Garth Brooks and held me close in his arms. I still love to be in his arms, and I believe I always will. As he taught me to two-step, his eyebrows were trembling once again, giving away that he was possibly having the same feelings of affection for me. Why else would he be so nervous? I enjoyed our date and the dancing, but it was not nearly as intimate as those first dances we shared in his room. Our date ended with our first kisses, and I knew in my heart that I was in the arms of the man I would marry (provided he asked!)

On December 31, 1994, at my best friend's wedding, Dan proposed marriage with a beautiful verse he had written just for me whilst his eyebrows trembled as if in suspense of my answer. He had to know I would say yes! We danced to "I Swear" by John Michael Montgomery on the reception dance floor, just like that dorm room floor where he danced his way into my heart. On this night, he danced his way into my future. Giddy and intoxicated with joy for the rest of the evening, we rang in the new year with hopes and dreams of our life together.

On July 27, 1996, as we recited our vows to one another underneath a vast chapel of blue skies and pillowy white clouds, I gazed affectionately into Dan's hazel eyes and witnessed, for the last time since, his eyebrows trembling with anticipation as we professed our forever love and devotion to each other. He had to know I would say yes!!! And I did. And he did. And we still do...

I love you, Dan! Happy Anniversary! Love always, Carrie

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Time warp to 1994...

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Here we are in one of the 1st pictures taken of us together (our first was probably the one taken of us together before we left to see Phantom of the Opera at Jones Hall in Houston while I was on a 40 hour break from my job as counselor at Camp El Tesoro; I can't find it!) - It's August 1994 at my Nanny & PePa's place on Lake Livingston. That's Dan's car in the back:

And this is one of my favorite pictures of us together while we were dating, taken in the Fall of 1994. We're sitting in the "Little Seattle" fountain at SHSU outside the residence hall where we met, Smith Hall (where Dan would later be an RA). This is where it all began...

Rock'n River Family Aquatic Center

2006-07-27T02:53:00.000-07:00

These are pictures of the new water park in Round Rock that I am going to take the kids to on Friday (Dan took them when he was there checking out the BSA camp before his week to volunteer). It's not spectacular, but I bet the kids will like it - they love the neighborhood pool! It has a couple of water slides, a huge super shallow splashing section for the little kiddoes and a "lazy river" with inner tubes that you can float around in...

shaded shallow pool for the young'uns:

lazy river (I guess more like a lazy creek - it's not really that big!) and you can see that the 2 water slides let out right here:

3300 Palm Valley Blvd (in Old Settlers park)
10 a.m. - 8 p.m. Mon., Tues. Thurs. Sat.
5 - 8 p.m. Weds
1 - 8 p.m. Fri & Sun.
$3 for Adults$2 for childrenNon-residents: add $1Pool Swim Passes (Good for 10 visits) Adults: $22.50 Children: $15 Non-residents: add $10

A small sample of A Day in the Life...

2006-07-24T21:12:00.000-07:00

Savanna loves to go get the Bub after I get her up from her nap. She is quite noisy when she is up and about, so Dallas and Noah heard her when we went in there this afternoon and decided to join in on the action. Noah hopped in the papasan, and Savanna followed close behind. She is in a copycat phase right now. She likes to do whatever her Bubbas are doing. She asked for her "Meenie" because she wanted to chill out and relax, suck her thumb a little. I went to get my camera because I knew this was going to be cute. Savanna asked Dallas to come in for a sit, and Dallas wanted to hold Bailey. Dallas asked me to make a movie of them, so I shot some video with my camera. I got From Chillin' to Screamin' in 17.8 Seconds, and I shot the sequel, From Screamin' to Chillin' in 60 Seconds, immediately afterwards. It's about 3 minutes total, but I have to say this is a really good sample of what I go through all day long.

There are many fun, sweet moments, sometimes calm, hardly ever quiet, mostly packed with action, and often loaded with conflict of one kind or another (mostly to do with Savanna screaming about something). Bubby cries a little here and there when he wants or needs attention, and Dallas and Noah have always got something going on. Savanna just wants to be included. She is the little sister and wants to be the center of attention, even with her "Bubbas." So she thinks she has to scream in order to be heard, and sadly, most of the time this is true. What's a little squirt gonna do? Isn't it amazing that such a loud noise can come from such a tiny person? I cannot even scream that loud (and definitely not at that pitch!) Did it make any of you jump a bit when you heard it (kind of like when you hear fingernails on the chalkboard)? Just wondering if it's only me, or if maybe it affects me more since I'm the mama. Can you believe I have not been committed to the looney bin yet? It's only a phase, it's only a phase... that's what I keep reminding myself, anyway...

This is the photo I took right after shooting the video. They are such good kids not to let Savanna's tantrums get them down. I am able to handle it so much better because of how easy they make it for me by remaining calm and collected and often times coming to the rescue by distracting her just like we parents do. I think they will make great dads someday, these boys of mine. I love all my babes!!! ...the Geegers, the Nani, and the Bub...

P.S. Savanna is wearing her favorite shirt: her "Nemo" shirt. Finding Nemo is her favorite movie right now, and when I saw the shirt for only $4, I thought she might like it. Little did I know... I can hardly get it away from her to wash it!!!